You almost have to admire the insane genius

Anonymouse · 30-07-2014, 11:04

To explain: I'm afraid I'm out of work again. I made a newbie mistake at Martin-Brower.

When you park a forklift, you're supposed to put a little forward tilt on the forks and lower them until the tips and heels just touch the floor, and whoever was using the forklift before me did just that. I forgot to level the forks before starting work. So when I came to pick a pallet out of the racking, as the forks went into the pallet they rubbed against the bar, bending it and popping it out of its supports, and the other two pallets in that location came down.

Oops.

I was sent home to wait for word as to whether I still had a job, but after a week I emailed the employment agency and they told me I'd been let go. I wasn't much surprised, of course. So now I'm claiming Universal Credit...

Would you believe you're expected to look for work for thirty-five hours a week?

If you don't, you can lose £10.30 per day - not per week, per day. But, and here's the kicker, although I did do this yesterday, I've been told by the jobcentre staff today that they're limiting people to 1 hour. It seems they're assuming people will use the internet at home, plus the library and the ucann centres. Ucann - yeah, right. You have to book in advance now, and they're not even open on Wednesdays. You only get one hour free at the library, after which you can have a maximum of 2 more hours - paying £1 an hour. So even if I go to both jobcentres, the library and the ucann, that's only 4 hours, or 6 if I pay £2 a day.

I'm required to do 7, unless of course I look for work at the weekend as well.

It's total genius. This means I'm virtually certain to be sanctioned, through no fault of my own. Multiply my situation by who knows how many tens of thousands of other people, and it adds up to a sizeable cut in the benefits bill, doesn't it?

On the other hand, I'm expecting a call from an agency that's got a good chance of getting me into work, and an email from another saying they need an FLT driver urgently. Here's hoping; I honestly can't take much more of this. I won't even get anything until the end of this month; it's paid monthly. I can imagine how unemployed single mothers are going cope with that.

Also, they've apparently done away with housing benefit; that's now part of UC. As far as I can tell they've just saved themselves the bother of paying people's rent to housing authorities and landlords by leaving it to the claimants. I imagine the same will soon apply to council tax - for some bizarre reason they've left that one out and at the moment you have to claim council tax benefit separately.

But the very worst thing is that crazy app they're using at the jobcentre. I will not dignify it by calling it a browser, though it's apparently some mutant version of IE. There are no navigation buttons, no menu bar, you can't type in URLs and you can't even use tabs. I normally do a jobsearch like this:

Access gmail - that way I can check for replies to applications, download a copy of my current CV and/or email applications whenever an ad ob Universal Jobmatch requires me to (some just have an 'apply' button, some don't and you have to email them).
Open a tab into Universal Jobmatch, and from there open another one to 'activity history', so I can be a good little boy and record my jobseeking activities immediately after I've done them in yet another tab I use to browse Reed, Fish4, Totaljobs etc. It's neat and efficient.

On their system, all this is impossible. It's awkward, clumsy and slllloooooooooooooowwwwwwww.

I am not a happy bunny. My sister has an old PC at her place; I think I'm going to have to borrow that and get internet access at home. I don't know if Windows 2000 can even support the latest versions of the latest browsers, and the PC's a dinosaur, but I certainly can't afford anything more recent. Here's hoping.

MalteseFalcon · 30-07-2014, 13:40

Anon, don't worry. I'm supposed to be doing 40 hours a week, but because I apply for so many jobs a week they never challenge how many hours I actually spend searching. I only do roughly 30 hours a week. My diary has at least 6 applications to jobs per week, which satisfies them. Only time they have threatened a sanction on me is when I forgot an appointment with my advisor, thought it was at 12 actually was at 11.

As it was my first missed appointment EVER, they let it go that time. Gutted for you, must have been horrible when it happened. I'd have probably mucked myself.

---------- Post added at 13:40 ---------- Previous post was at 13:37 ----------

And I thought the UC was being brought in for everyone? I'm still on fortnightly payments.

Kabaal · 30-07-2014, 13:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarkC1984

And I thought the UC was being brought in for everyone? I'm still on fortnightly payments.

Hardly anywhere uses UC yet, according to the .gov page it's only being used in

Bath
Hammersmith, London
Harrogate
Inverness
north-west England
Shotton, Wales

Pauls9 · 30-07-2014, 14:15

So sorry to hear that, Anonymouse. I guess you weren't there long enough to qualify for the usual warning system?

As far as I know, UC is paid by the government and council tax benefit comes from your local council with the rate decided by the council.

Good luck mate!

Anonymouse · 31-07-2014, 10:11

It's been rolled out in Bolton, and I'm now in its clutches.

The way jobcentre staff are so obstructionist fits right into the plan. I called in at the jobcentre I don't sign on at, just to check my email. I would only have been there two minutes or less, as I had something on this morning (sorted now), and Cerberus, a.k.a. the little erk whose job it is to turn people away if they have no appointment, refused me permission.

In other words, that's an hour a day I've lost. I'm now down to 5...if I pay for 2 of them at the library, and if (big if) I can get an hour at a ucann centre, since you have to book in advance. It is now impossible for me to do 7 hours until I get internet access at home. So since it's impossible I won't do it; I'll just have to lie. I hate doing that, even to these gits, but needs must.

I'm convinced it is indeed a cunning plan to reduce the benefits bill, though I wouldn't have thought the Tories to be this devious. It'll even 'solve' the housing problem:

UC includes housing benefit, i.e. rent, so saving them the bother of paying it to landlords/local authorities. But if people have their benefits cut because they can't meet these insane requirements, some of them likely won't be able to pay their rent. Thus they'll be evicted and end up on the streets. Best of all, once they're there they're off the dole figures, as you can't claim benefit with no fixed abode.

As I said, a cunning plan.

Anonymouse · 01-08-2014, 11:26

Actually I am getting the time in at the moment; it seems to depend on which member of jobcentre staff you talk to. But Universal Jobmatch, I've discovered, is useless for vacancies posted on the day before midday; I did my usual daily search this morning and it came up with nothing. Go figure.

I'm going to chase up one of the agencies who rang me recently. This is driving me crazy...or crazier, at any rate.

Anonymouse · 08-08-2014, 11:50

The nightmare may be over for a while - I say 'may' because I can't rid myself of the dread that this isn't going to work out.

To explain: I got a call from an agency offering temp FLT work, 6 - 8 weeks at Trafford Park. I'm going to Manchester to register with them and sort out the details. The only thing I'm concerned about is the circumstances under which I left my last job - if I have to tell them, they might not put me forward for the job. I'm not a hypocrite - I'd have doubts in their position.

Then again, I am a newbie, and that's the sort of mistake newbies make, hopefully only once. If they see that and agree, I'm in and I'll get a rest of sorts from Universal Credit for a few weeks. After that, well, I'll have a few hundred more quid in the bank and a few weeks' more experience.

I would say 'wish me luck', and I know you guys will do just that, but given how the last few years went, I don't want to depend on Lady Luck, as she's a fickle and unfaithful b**ch.

As Dave Lister might have said, I've spent enough time listening to my Paranoia; now it's time to listen to my Confidence!

Anonymouse · 09-08-2014, 14:00

Confidence 1, Paranoia 0!

The issue of why I was dismissed never came up! They didn't ask, so I damn well didn't tell 'em!

Oh, I would have - Mum, rest her soul, would never have forgiven me if I hadn't - but they didn't ask, so there you go! I'm starting on Monday at NGK Berylco in Manchester - it's just a few minutes' bicycle ride from Salford Crescent, so travelling's no problem.

The madness is over, at least for a few weeks!

Unless of course I screw up again -

(sound of blunt instrument repeatedly hitting Paranoia's bonce, as Confidence beats him soundly about the head with a copy of The Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy)

Not going to happen! I've made that mistake, and learned from it!

Hom3r · 09-08-2014, 14:28

Please tell me how the hell you are expected to look for work for 35 hours a week?

You don't knock on doors as I've been told companies just direct you to a website.

Plus online companies automatically email you possible contacts. I had about 12/14 of them I signed up to. I spent about 2 hours 3 times a week.

The DWP job site was a steaming pile if poo

I guess when I applied to 28 companies with a blind covering letter and CV, total of 3 pages printed on my home laser on high quality paper, plus collating, putting in A4 envelope trip to post office to by stamps, took about 4 hours.

The biggest thing is they didn't even have my job description listed or anything close so how the hell could they help me?

Anonymouse · 10-08-2014, 14:58

The only practical way is to check the various jobsites every hour or so; that's what I did in thje jobcentre. If you have internet access at home you can then spread it out over the entire day - but you must enter whatever you've done on Universal Jobmatch, because they do check, e.g. 'applied for position of Reach FLT driver in Manchester on Reed (ref 23645352)'. I know this for a fact because the adviser asked me about one or two jobs I'd applied for. If it takes you x hours to fill out an application form, put that down. Same for travelling to an interview (you have to apply for anything within 90 minutes' travel time). If you visit a site to drop off your CV and that takes an hour, it counts. If you spend an hour chatting to a relative who might know someone in the industry you want to work in, tell 'em about that, too. Of course, it isn't really going to take 35 hours, and whoever came up with that is off their head on bad acid if they think otherwise. But there is a flaw in the system: when you make an entry in your Activity History on Universal Jobmatch, there's no timestamp, even when it comes up on their terminal (I found that out when I sneaked a peek, aren't I a naughty boy?

). So how can they know exactly how long it took? Just apply for several vacancies in diverse locations, mix it up a bit with the odd visit to an employer and that seems to be enough. They'll tell you if it isn't.

MalteseFalcon · 10-08-2014, 16:01

Which is what I said. I put 100% effort in for my search, and have been commended for the dedication I show in applying. However, it still remains that I am getting desperate for a job. So much so, that I am now taking an attitude of applying for any job.

Hom3r · 10-08-2014, 20:20

I will not travel 90 minutes for a job, as I current spend over £1,600 a year on diesel as it is so there is no way I'm planning on spending £4,500+.

Plus what about car problems, weather problems, my area is a total bottleneck ant certain times of the day.

I work to live, not live to work.

So my get out of jail free card is raise my expected salary the further I have to travel.

Where I currently work I can afford to lose £1,000 to work in my town, which is my aim, as I hate travelling to work.

Russ · 10-08-2014, 20:38

Everyone's situations are different obviously but I already travel an hour each way for my daily commute, going up to 1 hour 20 when we move offices in September. Annoying? Yes but I have kids to support.

Anonymouse · 11-08-2014, 18:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hom3r

I will not travel 90 minutes for a job, as I current spend over £1,600 a year on diesel as it is so there is no way I'm planning on spending £4,500+. Plus what about car problems, weather problems, my area is a total bottleneck ant certain times of the day. I work to live, not live to work. So my get out of jail free card is raise my expected salary the further I have to travel. Where I currently work I can afford to lose £1,000 to work in my town, which is my aim, as I hate travelling to work.

Their view is that all of that is not their problem, I'm afraid. This 90-minute thing's been in force for years now. They don't care how much it costs to get to a given place; if it's within the 90-minute radius, you're expected to apply. End of.

As for me...I'm afraid Confidence has lost his point and Paranoia now has a no-score win. Yes, I'm out of work again.

The manager at NGK Berylco didn't think I had enough FLT experience to do the job he wanted. It's true I did bump into one or two things, but it's actually a very small place, and with all the stuff on the floor I'd argue it isn't really safe to use an FLT in there at all. You're not supposed to travel with your load in the air, but there are a couple of places where you have to.

On the other hand I was just a temp, so I couldn't really say anything. But if I'd been given a couple of days to settle in I'm sure I'd have adjusted. Alas, 'twas not to be. So tomorrow it's back to the grind.

To top it all, I've had a letter from the Universal Credit bods saying I haven't submitted all required evidence for my claim...but it doesn't say what I missed out. Bureaucracy at its finest, I tell you!

AbyssUnderground · 13-08-2014, 12:08

90 minutes travel? A slow walk will get you about 5 miles

Easy, just don't tell them if you have a car.