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Bex
18-01-2004, 14:13
was watching a movie last night the normal soppy slush about falling in love and living happily ever after, and it got me thinking, what is it really to be in love with someone? what does that term actually mean? and does it really exist?

i used to be the romantic one of my friends, when we got into discussions over love (most of them were materalists...ie everything has a phisological cause) i would be the one who said that love (falling in love) was something more than phsiological responses, i used to think it was something special and something magical, but now i am wondering whether it IS just a chemical response.... can LOVE really last? i don't mean the love that you feel for friends and family i mean undying love for one person?

maybe i am becoming more cynical in my old age..... or maybe i am finally seeing the world in the real way...no rose tinted glasses

so i ask you does love really exist? discuss

Chimaera
18-01-2004, 14:20
Nope it does not exist! :eek: I have never found any evidence to say it does.

Next question?? :rofl:

luftys
18-01-2004, 14:22
was watching a movie last night the normal soppy slush about falling in love and living happily ever after, and it got me thinking, what is it really to be in love with someone? what does that term actually mean? and does it really exist?

i used to be the romantic one of my friends, when we got into discussions over love (most of them were materalists...ie everything has a phisological cause) i would be the one who said that love (falling in love) was something more than phsiological responses, i used to think it was something special and something magical, but now i am wondering whether it IS just a chemical response.... can LOVE really last? i don't mean the love that you feel for friends and family i mean undying love for one person?

maybe i am becoming more cynical in my old age..... or maybe i am finally seeing the world in the real way...no rose tinted glasses
so i ask you does love really exist? discussWelcome to Earth Bex

Bex
18-01-2004, 14:29
Nope it does not exist! :eek: I have never found any evidence to say it does.

Next question?? :rofl:

but what does it mean to love chimmy? and what evidence against it have you found?

Chimaera
18-01-2004, 14:33
Ah - too much to air on a public forum methinks! Let's just say on experience so far I have no evidence to say that it does exist??

Bex
18-01-2004, 14:36
Ah - too much to air on a public forum methinks! Let's just say on experience so far I have no evidence to say that it does exist??

right on one point i am with you....i think we have talked about it previously....

come on anyone going to stick up for love and prove to me it does exist?

luftys
18-01-2004, 15:34
right on one point i am with you....i think we have talked about it previously....

come on anyone going to stick up for love and prove to me it does exist?
I will :angel: never give up on true love,they are different types of love,the love for your children,friends and partners( :naughty: )I think we all need to be Loved

Bex
18-01-2004, 15:39
I will :angel: never give up on true love,they are different types of love,the love for your children,friends and partners( :naughty: )I think we all need to be Loved

dad i agree, but if you ever actually read my posts, you will see post 1 i said i was not talking about the love of friends and family but rather the concept of falling IN love with someone.....

luftys
18-01-2004, 16:43
dad i agree, but if you ever actually read my posts, you will see post 1 i said i was not talking about the love of friends and family but rather the concept of falling IN love with someone.....
:walk: to get glasses :eek: some of my friends have been my partners :eek: :naughty:

PS.is this a 3way post :rofl:

ZrByte
18-01-2004, 17:00
Hmm, very interesting. I think love does exist but the very nature of our current society Stops love dead in its tracks.
We are all far too stressed/pre-occupied about paying our Bills, beeing noticed by those around us, Buying the latest and greatest (Cars, mobiles, houses) that we dont seem to be aware of even the simplest things around us.

For example love souldnt have anything to do with your Social stature or even appearence, when two people fall in love its supposed to be down to the very Sole of the other person.
Yet for some reason How much money someone has, and if they drive a nice car seems to factor in :shrug: (FFS even how smart thier shoes are is a factor :rofl: ) Until we get out of this 'Love Abyss' that were in I dont think true love that lasts forever can exist, its like trying to start a fire without Oxygen ;)

Reminds me of the destinys Child video, cant remember the name of the song (Think its something like Pay My Bills) I thought the song was about prostitutes when I first heard it, as money seems to be a pre-requisite for them, and not just a man with money but a man who pays thier share too, Yeah im really sure lots of money = true happiness (Please :rolleyes: ).

Now while its true lots of money can help (Hell even nice shoes are a help :rofl: ) they Just arnt, or at least shouldnt factor in yet somehow they always do.

Rant over!

Sorry about the potential lack of sense contained in the above post, I got 12hrs sleep last night but I feel like I only had 3hrs :cry:

Bex
18-01-2004, 17:08
Hmm, very interesting. I think love does exist but the very nature of our current society Stops love dead in its tracks.
We are all far too stressed/pre-occupied about paying our Bills, beeing noticed by those around us, Buying the latest and greatest (Cars, mobiles, houses) that we dont seem to be aware of even the simplest things around us.

For example love souldnt have anything to do with your Social stature or even appearence, when two people fall in love its supposed to be down to the very Sole of the other person.
Yet for some reason How much money someone has, and if they drive a nice car seems to factor in :Shrug: (FFS even how smart thier shoes are is a factor :rofl: ) Until we get out of this 'Love Abyss' that were in I dont think true love that lasts forever can exist, its like trying to start a fire without Oxygen ;)

Reminds me of the destinys Child video, cant remember the name of the song (Think its something like Pay My Bills) I thought the song was about prostitutes when I first heard it, as money seems to be a pre-requisite for them, and not just a man with money but a man who pays thier share too, Yeah im really sure lots of money = true happiness (Please :rolleyes: ).

Now while its true lots of money can help (Hell even nice shoes are a help :rofl: ) they Just arnt, or at least shouldnt factor in yet somehow they always do.

Rant over!

Sorry about the potential lack of sense contained in the above post, I got 12hrs sleep last night but I feel like I only had 3hrs :cry:

that made a lot of sense actually...let me summarise and see if i have gotten to the core of your arguement

love does exist, however our societal compulsion to show we are better/worse than another person is through our material gain and therefore love has (metaphorically) been put on the back burner, because it is deemed as not as important as having material gain?

homealone
18-01-2004, 17:11
<snip>
so i ask you does love really exist? discuss

in my opinion - yes.

I have to admit a bias, as we will celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary this year. :cool:

Our relationship has had it's rocky moments and I can't pretend that the 'pink fluffy romantic' phase lasts for ever, but my feeling is that it IS love that has kept us together, has allowed us to completely trust each other and be friends at the same time.:)

ZrByte
18-01-2004, 17:12
that made a lot of sense actually...let me summarise and see if i have gotten to the core of your arguement

love does exist, however our societal compulsion to show we are better/worse than another person is through our material gain and therefore love has (metaphorically) been put on the back burner, because it is deemed as not as important as having material gain?


At last I have found a translator For my Rants :D
Just to add though, its not so much that love is deemed less important its that love and Material Gain seem to be confused to mean the same thing.

Bex
18-01-2004, 17:16
At last I have found a translator For my Rants :D
Just to add though, its not so much that love is deemed less important its that love and Material Gain seem to be confused to mean the same thing.

i am good at translating rants :p i did a degree in philosophy ;)

interesting point about confusing material gain and love...can you elaborate...?

gaz congrates on the wedding anv...(no offence meant) but maybe the younger generation have been socialised to have diff priorties?

Julian
18-01-2004, 17:19
in my opinion - yes.

I have to admit a bias, as we will celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary this year. :cool:

Our relationship has had it's rocky moments and I can't pretend that the 'pink fluffy romantic' phase lasts for ever, but my feeling is that it IS love that has kept us together, has allowed us to completely trust each other and be friends at the same time.:)

Nice one Gaz :) Congratulations for later this year.

Colin
18-01-2004, 17:24
I dunno, when i look at my parents marriage i would say yes. They started going out when they were 14, and now they are 45ish, and to see them together then i would say yes definetly. But i think love is a term that is banded around a lot now, as soon as you start seeing someone you are expected to love them.

I once thought i was but when it came to splittlng up with her, (my fault) it was very easy to move away, so i kind of thought it wasn't the real thing.
I kinda hope it exists, gives something to look forward to :)

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 17:27
so i ask you does love really exist? discuss

If someone worships the ground that you walk on is that love?.

If someone you are involved with treats you with respect is that love?

If you ask a woman or a man to define what is love and what love actaually means to them i wonder just how many different answers you would get.

I believe love is not just sex 4 times a day 7 days a week.

love will only work if the feelings are mutual (why be with someone that your not happy with?)

Love is (for me) is wanting to be with my partner 24/7 & realising just how lucky i am to find my soul mate.

Bex
18-01-2004, 17:27
I dunno, when i look at my parents marriage i would say yes. They started going out when they were 14, and now they are 45ish, and to see them together then i would say yes definetly. But i think love is a term that is banded around a lot now, as soon as you start seeing someone you are expected to love them.

I once thought i was but when it came to splittlng up with her, (my fault) it was very easy to move away, so i kind of thought it wasn't the real thing.
I kinda hope it exists, gives something to look forward to :)

yes i think the word is over used...and i also think it gets confused with lust..i think you can think you love someone by how much you want them...

but i agree with your sentiments col i hope it does exist

Bex
18-01-2004, 17:33
If someone worships the ground that you walk on is that love?.

If someone you are involved with treats you with respect is that love?

If you ask a woman or a man to define what is love and what love actaually means to them i wonder just how many different answers you would get.

I believe love is not just sex 4 times a day 7 days a week.

love will only work if the feelings are mutual (why be with someone that your not happy with?)

Love is (for me) is wanting to be with my partner 24/7 & realising just how lucky i am to find my soul mate.

if love does exist i think it is trust, respect, friendship, and yes wanting to be with someone all the time, missing them when you dont see them or talk to them..... but the latter i am not sure it lasts and that is my point

soul mate...what do you mean?

Sociable
18-01-2004, 17:43
Does Love exist?

Undoubtedly.


Does every individual have the capacity to love and be loved?

Again undoubtedly.


Do one's life experiences and circumstances alter our belief in these two fundamental facts?

Sadly once again the answer is, undoubtedly!


Many see love as the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, forgetting that love is actually the journey not the destination. Concentrating on this, †œpot of goldâ₠¬Ã‚, blinds us to the magnificence of the rainbow that surrounds us on that journey.

The founding fathers of America summed it up best I think when they did not say happiness was a right but did say the pursuit of happiness was. The same is true of Love.

There are no guarantees only the hope in our hearts that love does exist and that we all possess the capacity to both give and receive it.

All each of us can do is love without condition when we are blessed with someone to love and leave our hearts open to the possibility that we can be loved for who we are in return.

Dare to believe in that possibility and take the risk of loving and sooner or later your courage will be rewarded, even if you receive some knocks along the way.

As my favourite poem says:

†œBe yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.ÃƒÂ¢Ã¢â€šà ¬Ã‚Â


:romance: :kiss: :kiss: :luv: :kiss: :kiss: :romance:

:ghugs:

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 17:44
if love does exist i think it is trust, respect, friendship, and yes wanting to be with someone all the time, missing them when you dont see them or talk to them..... but the latter i am not sure it lasts and that is my point

love will last as long as both partners want it to last.

love is i believe a combination of things because love will not survive if it has no foundations.

soul mate...what do you mean?

you will find out here (http://www.google.co.uk) :)

Bex
18-01-2004, 17:46
Does Love exist?

Undoubtedly.


Does every individual have the capacity to love and be loved?

Again undoubtedly.


Do one's life experiences and circumstances alter our belief in these two fundamental facts?

Sadly once again the answer is, undoubtedly!


Many see love as the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, forgetting that love is actually the journey not the destination. Concentrating on this, “pot of gold”, blinds us to the magnificence of the rainbow that surrounds us on that journey.

The founding fathers of America summed it up best I think when they did not say happiness was a right but did say the pursuit of happiness was. The same is true of Love.

There are no guarantees only the hope in our hearts that love does exist and that we all possess the capacity to both give and receive it.

All each of us can do is love without condition when we are blessed with someone to love and leave our hearts open to the possibility that we can be loved for who we are in return.

Dare to believe in that possibility and take the risk of loving and sooner or later your courage will be rewarded, even if you receive some knocks along the way.

As my favourite poem says:

“Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.”


:romance: :kiss: :kiss: :luv: :kiss: :kiss: :romance:

:ghugs:

:bigcry: that was a lovely, well thought out post...and i know exactly what you are saying......just reiterated our convo from earlier me thinks...

quick its all getting to sentimental, someone come along with the "it's all chemical reactions" view :p

Bex
18-01-2004, 17:48
love will last as long as both partners want it to last.

love is i believe a combination of things because love will not survive if it has no foundations.



you will find out here (http://www.google.co.uk) :)

DrA i meant what doe YOU think that a soul mate means, i know what i think it is.....

if any of you have ever read any of plato's dialogues there was a section in there discussing love (this was not the view of plato, or his mentor socrates, but it was discussed)

when the earth was made, people were formed of a circlular being, two people joined together to form the perfect circle...but when we annoyed God/the gods/whatever, we were cast out and seperated, the story goes that when you meet your "soulmate" you are meeting the other half of your circle

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 18:04
DrA i meant what doe YOU think that a soul mate means, i know what i think it is.....

I know what a soul mate is (well my definition) because i typed those 2 words. :rofl:

My soul mate is a suitable person that is an ideal partner for me (hopefully for life).

I may never find my soul mate i guess alot of people ever do.

As its getting close to Feb 17th whos gonna start a thread on romance :rofl:

Bex
18-01-2004, 18:07
I know what a soul mate is (well my definition) because i typed those 2 words. :rofl:

My soul mate is a suitable person that is an ideal partner for me (hopefully for life).

I may never find my soul mate i guess alot of people ever do.

whose in a pedantic mood today? :rolleyes: how was i meant to know what your definition of a soulmate was? hence the question :rolleyes: :p

do others believe in this concept of a "soul mate"?

Sociable
18-01-2004, 18:08
when the earth was made, people were formed of a circlular being, two people joined together to form the perfect circle...but when we annoyed God/the gods/whatever, we were cast out and seperated, the story goes that when you meet your "soulmate" you are meeting the other half of your circle


I take a different view on this as I have been blessed with finding many "soul-mates" through the years. For me these are the people that I share a special bond with on emotional, intellectual and also philosophical levels.

This is distinct from love which can, but often does not, involve the same degree of oneness. In fact most often those we love compliment rather than mirror our view of the world.

For me it is not a case of half plus half making †œoneâà ƒÂ¢Ã¢â‚¬Å¡Ã‚¬Ã‚ , but more a case of one plus one making so much more than either one could do all by itself.

EDIT: For the pedantic among us I deliberately conjoin soul and mate as soul mate infers a singular person with whom to mate rather than the true meaning of soul-mate which is a bonding of souls into a single entity.

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 18:15
whose in a pedantic mood today? :rolleyes: how was i meant to know what your definition of a soulmate was? hence the question :rolleyes: :p

do others believe in this concept of a "soul mate"?

I thought all woman knew what a soul mate is.
I guess you dont read Catherine Cookson books?

okay simplified its my ideal compatable partner.

Like most people i will have to kiss many many frogs before i find my soul mate.

Bex
18-01-2004, 18:18
I take a different view on this as I have been blessed with finding many "soulmates" through the years. For me these are the people that I share a special bond with on emotional, intellectual and also philosophical levels.

This is distinct from love which can, but often does not, involve the same degree of oneness. In fact most often those we love compliment rather than mirror our view of the world.

For me it is not a case of half plus half making “one”, but more a case of one plus one making so much more than either one could do all by itself.

EDIT: For the pedantic among us I deliberately conjoin soul and mate as soul mate infers a singular person with whom to mate rather than the true meaning of soulmate which is a bonding of souls into a single entity.

see u edited your typo before i could comment on it soc :p

i agree..... over the years i have come into contact with people who are completely on my wavelength.....they always become close friends.... i guess we all seek that kind of thing from our partner...

and DrA don't give me the "your a women so you must know...." you mentioned in another thread about taring everyone with the same brush, and you are doing exactly the same :p

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 18:27
DrA don't give me the "your a women so you must know...." you mentioned in another thread about taring everyone with the same brush, and you are doing exactly the same :p

You dont play fair :cry:

Bex
18-01-2004, 18:29
You dont play fair :cry:

i dont play fair or i don't play by your rules ;)

dont cry :ghugs:

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 18:49
i dont play fair or i don't play by your rules ;)

dont cry :ghugs:

I'm actually suprised you didnt know :)

you can never play by my rules because i dont have any.

Bex
18-01-2004, 18:51
I'm actually suprised you didnt know :)

you can never play by my rules because i dont have any.

fair enough, thats a good way to be i suppose :D

DrAwesome
18-01-2004, 19:09
fair enough, thats a good way to be i suppose :D

well what else could i say/type :eek: :)