Do you steal from work?

[Sideshow Bob]

I myself have been known to pinch a few pens, calculator and paperclips.



What have you stollen and where do you work?



I would be intrested to hear if any of you guys work in a zoo and have stole a monkey?

[Ramrod]

Since I'm the boss, no :D

[Nugget]

I'm just waiting for the first numpty to come along and not only admit it, but also say where they did it :D

[c1rcle]

I was once accused of stealing money from a place I worked, my answer at the time was "if you think I've stolen anything call the police & let them deal with it". I left a few weeks later as I couldn't carry on working for someone who had wrongfully accused me of theft.

[Xaccers]

I worked for a company contracted to the MoD supplying them with computer equipment.
We had a 10% max profit contract.
Our supplier would often make mistakes, sending extra hard drives, or complete computers, and even a colour laserjet 5 without any documentation.
They'd refuse to take them back as there was no proof they'd sent them, we couldn't sell them as we'd be making more than 10% profit, so they would have to be disposed of.
We of course would do our best to get them returned to the supplier, no really, we did!
Does that count?

Wish I had an estate car at the time, as the colour LJ was taking up space we really could have used.

[MovedGoalPosts]

May I just remind everyone:

"You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence"

:D

[DocDutch]

does "testing" apply to nicking?

[LemonyBrainAid]

May I just remind everyone:

"You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence"

:D


... "You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to an attorney. Anything you dosay can and will be used against you in a court of law."

as they would say in the states :p:

[Nikesh]

We had a 10% max profit contract.
Our supplier would often make mistakes, sending extra hard drives, or complete computers, and even a colour laserjet 5 without any documentation.
They'd refuse to take them back as there was no proof they'd sent them, we couldn't sell them as we'd be making more than 10% profit, so they would have to be disposed of.

You could sell them to me for a 10% profit, I wouldn't mind... ;) :D

[Stuart]

:erm: Pens, pencils, sound cards etc.

At one point I also had a US Robotics 56k modem that I borrowed overnight from the boss (I asked him) and forgot to give back. I also had an iBook G3. This was sort of OK, as I was in charge of lending it out to lecturers, and none ever wanted it. Basically if one had asked for it, I'd have had to go home and get it.

[DocDutch]

I've got at home from work quite a few little things... ie sata drive that came out of a dead computer, 1gb of memory again out of a dead computer, ups ermmm what else I dont know

[Xaccers]

When I was at college I used to work for BHS, and this continued now and again whenever I was home from Uni.
One day we were told we had to sign the till roll whenever we signed on or off.
Some of the tills were down and managment were looking at the floor workers.
Then one of the assistant dept managers had to cover downstairs and suddenly the till that was down moved with her.
So they set up a camera and filmed her.
She was called into the office and shown the film, to which she replied "do I still have a job? I don't have to work on the till" the cheek of it!
They could prove she took several thousand, but reckoned it was actually around £10K.
Her boyfriend used drugs, so she started stealing to feed his habbit, then finding it easy she stole to boost her own income. Colleagues thought it was strange that she'd invite them out clubbing just before payday and offer to pay for them.

[daz300]

pens , pads , plasters , not a lot to nick from my work . :(

[Bill C]

NO

[dilli-theclaw]

NOWhat about that asteroid deflector system you half inched ;) :)

[Stuart]

Actually one work colleague did something I consider rather low (and reported him to the manager for).

We were all working for a large retailer, which uses full terminals with drawers for tills.

I was at work one morning, and this guy came in, and took £10 out of the till, saying it was for Stamps. Possibly, it was. However, the stamps never appeared.

Later on, at the end of trading, I was going through the end-of-day figures, and I noticed that the computer had logged a £10 withdrawal under another member of staff's account. I knew for a fact that THAT member of staff wasn't in (he'd gone out for the day with his girlfriend), so, I reported my concerns to the Manager.

The manager thanked me, and said that if the member of staff who the system logged as taking the money, HAD taken the money, he'd probably have got a written warning (they took theft seriously). As it happens, when he checked into it, my boss found that the particular member of staff didn't have access to the part of the computer system he would have needed to log the withdrawal. Guess who did? Guess who was also the only member of staff who wasn't a manager, yet whose account had access to change the access rights for other accounts? Yep. You guessed it. The guy who actually *did* take the money.

Guess who didn't know that the system logged all actions taken involving manager's rights (such as promoting other accounts)? Well, none of us did, until the manager told us..

[Xaccers]

Actually one work colleague did something I consider rather low (and reported him to the manager for).

We were all working for a large retailer, which uses full terminals with drawers for tills.

I was at work one morning, and this guy came in, and took £10 out of the till, saying it was for Stamps. Possibly, it was. However, the stamps never appeared.

Later on, at the end of trading, I was going through the end-of-day figures, and I noticed that the computer had logged a £10 withdrawal under another member of staff's account. I knew for a fact that THAT member of staff wasn't in (he'd gone out for the day with his girlfriend), so, I reported my concerns to the Manager.

The manager thanked me, and said that if the member of staff who the system logged as taking the money, HAD taken the money, he'd probably have got a written warning (they took theft seriously). As it happens, when he checked into it, my boss found that the particular member of staff didn't have access to the part of the computer system he would have needed to log the withdrawal. Guess who did? Guess who was also the only member of staff who wasn't a manager, yet whose account had access to change the access rights for other accounts? Yep. You guessed it. The guy who actually *did* take the money.

Guess who didn't know that the system logged all actions taken involving manager's rights (such as promoting other accounts)? Well, none of us did, until the manager told us..

Well done for reporting such a low life!

[jumbo159]

i've not lifted anything, but i remember a story of a geezer from the company that was caught. All computer gear at work has a unique bar code on it. The bush ranger only went and took pics of a laptop he'd lifted (with bar code visible) and put it up on ebay. It was spotted, and was purchased 'local pick up' by the company.... sacked!

[lostandconfused]

theres nothing to steal in work with me, the only thing that isnt bolted to the floor is the mouse, and im pretty sure if unplugged an alarm would sound somewhere.

It was brought up in a meeting of a new system that would ration the use of toilet paper by use of a 4 digit pin, but it was deemed to expensive so they just stopped providing it altogether and make you bring your own.

I do have my eye on the bosses new car, would i have to declare it as a taxable benefit, if i were to long-term borrow it?

[Maggy]

The odd pen by mistake..I also keep wandering off with the whiteboard markers and have to wander back and replace them.:rolleyes:


Behaviour report pads..but that's not nicking 'cos you can't use 'em for anything else but reporting bad or good behaviour.Not much point in using them as notepaper unless you want to make 4 copies of each note 'cos they are made of duplicate paper.

So no I don't 'nick' stuff from work..there is no point.

[Mr_love_monkey]

I don't steal.... I just borrow and forget to return them.. and now I've left the company so I can't really do anything about it...

so I won a zip drive and several books.... well they did make me redundant, because they were shutting down development in the london office, so it's not like anyone there would have made use of them

[Xaccers]

The odd pen by mistake..I also keep wandering off with the whiteboard markers and have to wander back and replace them.:rolleyes:


Behaviour report pads..but that's not nicking 'cos you can't use 'em for anything else but reporting bad or good behaviour.Not much point in using them as notepaper unless you want to make 4 copies of each note 'cos they are made of duplicate paper.

So no I don't 'nick' stuff from work..there is no point.


Not helped yourself to a quick sniff of the banda fluid after a long day? :D

[handyman]

a few pens and mugs , however I get more than my fair share of pens and mugs from trade fairs. They have started giving away usb keys at most fairs now also.

[Scarlett]

pens, envelopes the usual things but since I often work from home I figure its just me supplying the home office.

On the other hand I did have a job a few years back that I hated. Then they made me redundant*. I was working the last week before I took the redundancy****. Working late, unpaid*****, (because that was the job not the hours) and I took a carrier bag to the stationary cupboard and went 'shopping' does that count?

Scarlett.

Cut a long story short I was good at my job, D*mn good**. But due to continual cutbacks I didn't get a pay rise for 2 years and the chances of promotion, well considering everyone got an 'Average' for their yearly appraisals*** and you needed 2 consecutive appraisals at 'good' or 'outstanding' to be considered for promotion.

** As in I was the one sent onto client site if the proverbial hit the fan.

** probably due to the fact that if anyone got promoted, they couldn't replace them due to said 'cutbacks'

**** Voluntary in my case but as I said I realised I actually hated the job.

***** The last time I ever did unpaid overtime on the other hand, the company in question probably owe me 6 months overtime...

[TheCrow]

Pens, stationary, couple of pc's, cars, all sorts. HAHAHA

[danielf]

Time mostly, as in browsing, posting on here, and generally ****ing about. I tend to make up for it though.

[Maggy]

Not helped yourself to a quick sniff of the banda fluid after a long day? :D

Banda Fluid!! I haven't sen that in 20 odd years..it's all copy machines and laser printers these days.Thankfully! I hated setting up a document for the banding machine.Mind watching the kids sniff the sheets was a funny sight..:)

[Horace]

In my younger days I used to nick the odd pint of milk on the milk float I was helping deliver from. Other than that I've accidentally walked out of work with the odd pen and was once given permission to take home an Apple IIe by the manager, after he noticed my interest in what was an antique by then,without the shop owners consent. Was never sure whether I should of mentioned it or not to the shop owner and always felt slightly guilty about it. I still have the evidence in my loft :).

[homealone]

if we have items which have 'no commercial value', we authorise withdrawal via a chitty system, ;)

[valor]

Hmmm, poster must be feeling gilty...
So its off your chest..Now what???

[Bill C]

What about that asteroid deflector system you half inched ;) :)

OK i confess there was that and the 2.4 gig wimax torrent server and the Newsserver and the .............................:D

[ian@huth]

My brother used to work for a warehouse which held stock for many high street names. They were allowed to take items from the waste skips. There were many electrical items thrown in the skip by company reps after they had checked returned damaged items. It was amazing how many good items could be made out of just a few damaged items. Because reps only used to call once a month to authorise disposal there was usually a few of each item together in the skips from which several good ones could be made.

This wasn't actually stealing as staff had received permission to take home things from the skips.

[Xaccers]

My brother used to work for a warehouse which held stock for many high street names. They were allowed to take items from the waste skips. There were many electrical items thrown in the skip by company reps after they had checked returned damaged items. It was amazing how many good items could be made out of just a few damaged items. Because reps only used to call once a month to authorise disposal there was usually a few of each item together in the skips from which several good ones could be made.

This wasn't actually stealing as staff had received permission to take home things from the skips.


I think one of my dad's old bosses did something similar with IBM, raided their bins, made working systems and sold them, the left over stuff they sold as scrap.
Problem was they didn't have permission, so ended up in prison for a year if I remember correctly.

[Vlad_Dracul]

Not really pinching,more a case of criminal waste-my company actually pays another company to dispose of its old computer equipment. When i say old it isnt really old. We are not talking old 486 pcs here. In the last few years they have "disposed" of hundreds of Panasonic P3 Toughbooks,loads of pentium 4 desktop workstations and they are about to dispose of another load of high spec P3 Toughbooks by another manufacturer. When it was suggested that they could give them away to employees or charity,or even sell them to employees for a nominal fee (charity gift) they poo poo'd it. Strange thing is,they pay to have this "waste" taken away and most of it is clearly then being sold on Ebay !!

[Shaun]

I'm just waiting for the first numpty to come along and not only admit it, but also say where they did it :D

or post it from their work connection

[Graham M]

I work from home :)

[bmxbandit]

I tend to do the opposite - buy my own stationery, as it's less effort than going through all the red tape to get it... :p:

[TraxData]

My best friend used to work for a pc company which i wont name :P

But he used to do stock control...and seeing as he was always in the stock room, took quite a few xeon cpus, memory, gfx cards, you name it, he took it lol.

Kinda wrong really, but i didnt complain (cough) not that i got anything off him of course...

His boss was an ass, so maybe they deserved it :P

[Greyrider]

I never nicked nuffin, sir, 'onest.

Did borrow a pick to do some ground breaking 42 years ago, and I've still got it - the old NCB didn't buy rubbish y'know.

I've also had quite a bit of scrap metal in my time - all covered by the appropriate chitty.

[Nidge]

When I was on the lorries a few years ago we got the contract to clear out the local Sara Lee factory in Sutton in Ashfield, the contract was due to last 4 months then the whole lot was going to get boarded up. We went in one day and there must have been 10 pallets full of Kyrocia laser printers, computer towers, 17 inch monitors, we asked the security guards and the guy who was there from Sara Lee what was going to happen to the printers and all the other stuff? They said skip them all we don't need them, we loaded them onto the trucks and away we went, to the skip you might ask?? Nah I used to have a big garage so all the lot went in there.:D :D :D I gave a few printers, monitors and towers to charity the other bits I kept and sold on.

[Hom3r]

Where I work apart from stationary the only thing worth borrowing is a ALF502 (thats a jet engine for a BAe-146 airplane).

Not the most consealable item.

[Halcyon]

A paper pad and some pens. That's it.