View Full Version : Burial or cremation? Which would you prefer?
Macca371
26-07-2004, 01:50
I know this is a morbid question, but I'm just curious...
......does it really matter?? :D
Macca371
26-07-2004, 01:53
......does it really matter?? :D
Well, to some people, yeah. This can be a really spiritual thing...
The person in question, perhaps, wouldn't know/care/be able to ponder such a thought.
Those left behind? .. ask them.
I defo want to be cremated, I've got this dread that I will wake up in a coffin :eek:
Macca371
26-07-2004, 02:10
The person in question, perhaps, wouldn't know/care/be able to ponder such a thought.
Well that depends on your spiritual beliefs.
greencreeper
26-07-2004, 02:42
I've gone for a cardboard box under a tree, no religious representitives and no big fuss. I've picked Amazing Grace and Abide With Me for hymns because not only are they great songs but they're also guaranteed to get the ******* wailing :D And if they fail, I've picked REM's Everybody Hurts as a nod to the cheesy modern funerals of today. For the funeral tea, I'm not too bothered (obviously) but I think everybody should be in miltary dress uniform, just for the laugh, and no buffet - a proper meal. Buffets mean food poisoning, things you can't identify and are better off not knowing, and a nightmare time trying to get asparagus and mushroom vol au vent out the carpet after hoards of people have thoroughly trampled it in. Oh and lots of booze so people can get legless and start fighting (my family make the Adamms look functional).
[edit] Oh and hun I really must have Dusty's Going Back as a nod to my sexuality. There'll be a fair few queens at the funeral I imagine.
Cremation for me. If the option exists when I die I think I would like my ashes released into space "From the Stars we came, to the stars we return" .
As a non religious person I dont want a service of any kind, would like my family to through a party, sorta like a wake (spelling?) but I dont want it solom and I dont want to be mentioned in anyway if possible.
Well, see, the thing is, I find cremation so ... impersonal. There is no real body if a gravestone is erected. It is just so ... empty.
orangebird
26-07-2004, 08:53
Cremation for me please. I'm not religious, and couldn't bear the thought of rotting away in a box. And I want Marvin Gaye and Tammi Tarrells 'Aint no Mountain High Enough' and DeeLites 'Groove is in the Heart' played at the after party. :)
I don't think being buried is anything to do with being religious for most people, I'd say it's more 'traditional'.
I think the two have very different symbolism, which is enough to put me off cremation..
I don't really care what happens.. but for those that have to deal with it when I'm gone, I'd prefer to be "laid to rest" than "burned up by flames" which would symbolise something rather hellish in my mind.
That said, I have no problem with cremation, some of my extended family have been cremated.. it's just a personal thing.
** oooh, 1000th post.. at least it wasn't spam this time :D
Burial for me, after a 2 day wake where everyone get's rat arsed.
philip.j.fry
26-07-2004, 09:33
I've gone for a cardboard box under a tree, no religious representitives and no big fuss.
:tu: Same here, nice biodegradeable coffin somewhere with a young tree planted on top after medical science has finished with my corpse.
Cremation and ashes spread in the garden,leaves more room for the living.
I hate graveyards and regard them as a waste of space and then all the rigid bureaucratic rules about headstones,pictures,flowers from small minded jobs worth individuals hardly makes them a place of peace.
Incog. :)
bury me 6ft under and watch the maggots eat me :D
bury me 6ft under and watch the maggots eat me :D
Aaaah - a secret Slipknot fan, eh :p:
Not a big fan of cremation but, TBH, as long as they're 100% sure that I'm dead, I'm not too bothered - whichever my family / loved ones would prefer.
As long as there's a wake where everybody gets plastered, that'll do me :)
Cremation and ashes spread in the garden,leaves more room for the living.
I hate graveyards and regard them as a waste of space and then all the rigid bureaucratic rules about headstones,pictures,flowers from small minded jobs worth individuals hardly makes them a place of peace.
Incog. :)
You've obviously never visited an irish cemetary, people get comfort from visiting graves, praying over them, tidying them up etc, I like to visit long dead relatives and talk to them. (and this is for the comment below yours, unless fly's start learning how to burrow 6 feet in to the ground, you're not going to get eaten by maggots)
I know this is a morbid question, but I'm just curious...
one of the old gits up the pub always used to say burial because fire was invented and not created by god.
I asked him one day if god created teh shovel :D
I don't care as long as I'm dead first...! :D
Mr_love_monkey
26-07-2004, 13:16
Cremation for me... I don't like the idea of rotting away... also since my blood is about 60% proof, I'll burn more quickly :)
Aaaah - a secret Slipknot fan, eh :p:
never heard there songs it was just something that i felt like saying because its true lol
Not a big fan of cremation but, TBH, as long as they're 100% sure that I'm dead, I'm not too bothered - whichever my family / loved ones would prefer.
As long as there's a wake where everybody gets plastered, that'll do me
each to their own i suppose, no alcohol at mine :p:
Cremated and ashes scattered (don't yet know where)
My father (dead for almost 3 years) wanted his (and my mothers) ashes scattered together in the river that flows through their farm in Latvia when it is in full flow with the spring meltwater.
Earl of Bronze
26-07-2004, 13:27
Cremation for me.
I'll want half my ashes scattered in Northern Ireland (dont know where though). And the other half scattered from Signal Hill in St. John's, Newfoundland.
You've obviously never visited an irish cemetary, people get comfort from visiting graves, praying over them, tidying them up etc, I like to visit long dead relatives and talk to them. (and this is for the comment below yours, unless fly's start learning how to burrow 6 feet in to the ground, you're not going to get eaten by maggots)
That would be the ideal Bifta,but the reality is that either the graves are totally neglected or the local council forbids any kind of unique individuality and insists on standardisation.All headstones same size,all flower pots removed no flowers so as to allow for the uniform cleaning up of said cemetary which half the time is very lax anyway. :mad:
Remove the headstones and scatter ashes that way it doesn't matter.Make them gardens for rememberance.Nothing sadder than looking at the grave of a person long gone that no one visits. :(
ian@huth
26-07-2004, 13:38
Once I am gone I aren't too bothered about what happens to my body. I find it disgusting that funerals cost what they do nowadays and what a waste of money and natural resources on fancy elaborate coffins that are either burnt or buried and left to rot.
That would be the ideal Bifta,but the reality is that either the graves are totally neglected or the local council forbids any kind of unique individuality and insists on standardisation.All headstones same size,all flower pots removed no flowers so as to allow for the uniform cleaning up of said cemetary which half the time is very lax anyway. :mad:
Remove the headstones and scatter ashes that way it doesn't matter.Make them gardens for rememberance.Nothing sadder than looking at the grave of a person long gone that no one visits. :(
I've never heard of that, not even while I lived in England, mind you the only cemetaries my family members have been buried in are part of the church, some of the headstones are stunning, normally paid for by the person before they die, I would much rather lose a couple of thousand in inheritance and have an real effort made on their grave. I spent a good few hours last week redoing my partners mother's grave ready for a blessing in a few weeks, it's satisfying and gives her entire family somewhere to pay their respects.
Interesting this..................hope many people have included their wishes in their will. I recently wrote mine and included my wishes.
I defo want to be cremated, I've got this dread that I will wake up in a coffin :eek:
Unfortunately you would also be in a coffin when you were cremated. So you would burn to death rather unpleasantly if you were to be mistakenly alive......
I'm not worried what happens to my body after I am gone. It's my spirit that I care about.
greencreeper
26-07-2004, 14:28
I've never heard of that, not even while I lived in England, mind you the only cemetaries my family members have been buried in are part of the church, some of the headstones are stunning, normally paid for by the person before they die, I would much rather lose a couple of thousand in inheritance and have an real effort made on their grave. I spent a good few hours last week redoing my partners mother's grave ready for a blessing in a few weeks, it's satisfying and gives her entire family somewhere to pay their respects.
I'm with you on giving the relative a place to come and grieve. I liked the tree idea because the tree would be nourished from me - a living memorial.
When my grandad died my mum wanted to have "Little Harry" put on a flower urn at the spot where his ashes were buried. The Bishop said no. So it's not always the Council - sometimes it's the Church. I'm not certain which is the worst.
I'm with you on giving the relative a place to come and grieve. I liked the tree idea because the tree would be nourished from me - a living memorial.
When my grandad died my mum wanted to have "Little Harry" put on a flower urn at the spot where his ashes were buried. The Bishop said no. So it's not always the Council - sometimes it's the Church. I'm not certain which is the worst.
The Bishop? heh, did the priest say no first? The only restrictions in the grave yard I'm going to be buried in is that you take your dead flowers home with you instead of dumping them on the grounds.
I want cremating and I want my coffin to disapear behind the curtins to the strains of wish me luck as you wave me goodbye :)
greencreeper
26-07-2004, 14:52
The Bishop? heh, did the priest say no first? The only restrictions in the grave yard I'm going to be buried in is that you take your dead flowers home with you instead of dumping them on the grounds.
The Vicar said no because the Bishop didn't want such things in his graveyard. I thought it was our graveyard since we're the ones who have relatives there and will soon enough be there ourselves, but if the Bishop wants to be interred, I'd be happy to help :D
Unfortunately you would also be in a coffin when you were cremated. So you would burn to death rather unpleasantly if you were to be mistakenly alive......
Wouldn't having your blood drained and replaced with embalming fluid finish you off long before going anywhere near a coffin?
Personally, which ever is cheaper after as many of my organs as possible are taken to help others.
There's a thought, they take organs, but why not blood?
Rather than the normal 3/4 of a pint they could take and use the lot.
Earl of Bronze
26-07-2004, 15:35
Wouldn't having your blood drained and replaced with embalming fluid finish you off long before going anywhere near a coffin?
Personally, which ever is cheaper after as many of my organs as possible are taken to help others.
There's a thought, they take organs, but why not blood?
Rather than the normal 3/4 of a pint they could take and use the lot.
With the blood not beeing pumped around the body, and no longer being oxygenated, it quickly becomes useless. ( I think ). When the heart stops beating, the blood, like any other liquid settles to the lowest part of the body. Leaving that part of the body discoloured by the excess of blood. Lividity (sp) I think it's called.
Wouldn't having your blood drained and replaced with embalming fluid finish you off long before going anywhere near a coffin?
Personally, which ever is cheaper after as many of my organs as possible are taken to help others.
There's a thought, they take organs, but why not blood?
Rather than the normal 3/4 of a pint they could take and use the lot.
Doesnt the blood become unusable in less than a few hours when dead though? Good Idea if it didnt though ;)
as for those talking about cremation, it doesnt look like it will be possible for much longer anyway. I dont know how long it will take to do this though I do know that steps are beeeing taken to introduce freeze drying corpses rather than cremating as the furnaces that they use to cremate are extremeley harmful to the local environment (Must be what Americans power thier cars on ;) )
Wouldn't having your blood drained and replaced with embalming fluid finish you off long before going anywhere near a coffin?
Personally, which ever is cheaper after as many of my organs as possible are taken to help others.
There's a thought, they take organs, but why not blood?
Rather than the normal 3/4 of a pint they could take and use the lot.
No. But I do work in the medical profession....so maybe I am immune?
orangebird
26-07-2004, 16:39
never heard there songs it was just something that i felt like saying because its true lol
each to their own i suppose, no alcohol at mine :p:
Why no alcohol?
Why no alcohol?
i dont like alcohol, i despise the stuff, however i dont judge others on whether they should or shouldnt drink it, its up to them, but not when my time is up!! :erm:
btw i also dont think drowning you sorrows is a good idea, there is nothing to celebrate really, just think/talk about the person who you have just lost....
Flubflow
26-07-2004, 16:53
Quote from the end of a bizarre Monty Python sketch about a man who goes into funeral parlour to discuss how to put his mother to rest (bury, cremate or eat her).....
"Well sir, you could eat her and, if you feel guilty afterwards, then we could dig a grave and you could throw up into it".
greencreeper
26-07-2004, 16:58
Quote from the end of a bizarre Monty Python sketch about a man who goes into funeral parlour to discuss how to put his mother to rest (bury, cremate or eat her).....
"Well sir, you could eat her and, if you feel guilty afterwards, then we could dig a grave and you could throw up into it".
I nominate FlubFlow for "Poor Taste Post of the Month" :D
Unfortunately you would also be in a coffin when you were cremated. So you would burn to death rather unpleasantly if you were to be mistakenly alive......James Bond, Diamonds are forever.
Reminds me, didn't I read somewhere that they have to build LARGER crematorium furnaces, to accomodate the larger sizes.
Flubflow
26-07-2004, 18:00
I nominate FlubFlow for "Poor Taste Post of the Month" :D
Thanks. :D
If it was good enough to be broadcast on BBC2 way back in the 1970's then it is good enough for this forum. :D
Chimaera
26-07-2004, 18:42
Cremation for me!
All my wishes have been written down and stored with my will - made 7 years ago so my ex wouldn't get his hands on my dosh! :D
My Dad's funeral was awful - he didn't leave a will and had never said what he would like at his funeral - it was really hard trying to do things as we all thought he would have wanted them. So mine has been planned down to the last detail! Shame I won't be there to enjoy the party - it should be good! :D
And my Dad has a plaque and a lovely yellow rose bush which is kept very neat and tidy in the City of London Crematorium - so I go there to pay my respects and have a chat when I want to. :)
Burial for me. But i want one of those tv Head stones that i saw on here a while ago telling everyone who comes to visit me that they are standing on my knackers :D
Theodoric
26-07-2004, 19:00
What about immortality? :)
Cremation for me i'd like my ashes scattered not sure were though
greencreeper
26-07-2004, 19:07
What about immortality? :)
No thanks. I'm 27 and I've had enough already :D
I'd love a New Orleans style funeral followed by a cremation.
However perhaps it would be better to leave the money to be spent on a wake.:D
Maybe a tomb. Yes that's it i'm going to have a tomb :D
i also dont think drowning you sorrows is a good idea, there is nothing to celebrate really, just think/talk about the person who you have just lost....
I got absolutely drunk as anything at my grans wake and would expect the same of everybody whilst I'm shovelling coal down below
I've gone for cremation. For music I want "Smack my Bitch Up by The Prodigy" and Live & Let Die by Wings.. Mainly because they are not really that appropriate..
btw i also dont think drowning you sorrows is a good idea, there is nothing to celebrate really, just think/talk about the person who you have just lost....
Generally, drowning your sorrows isn't a good idea. However, in regards to funerals, I like what some Irish do. They do not mourn the passing of a person, rather hold a wake to celebrate their life. I think that is a nice way of doing things. Of course, being Irish, drink (particularly Guiness) comes into it slightly..
give me the cheapest disposal possible (do dustbin men take bodies?) and spend the rest on having a great time.
Earl of Bronze
26-07-2004, 22:51
Generally, drowning your sorrows isn't a good idea. However, in regards to funerals, I like what some Irish do. They do not mourn the passing of a person, rather hold a wake to celebrate their life. I think that is a nice way of doing things. Of course, being Irish, drink (particularly Guiness) comes into it slightly..
Just a little too much stereotyping there scastle.
Not everyone, north and south of the boarder drinks stout. Thanks very much. :)
I got absolutely drunk as anything at my grans wake and would expect the same of everybody whilst I'm shovelling coal down below
Sounds like a fantasic euphemism :D
Just a little too much stereotyping there scastle.
Not everyone, north and south of the boarder drinks stout. Thanks very much. :)True, but all the Irish people I know do...
And, unless I am very much mistaken, lots of drinking does often go on at Wakes (whatever the drink).
True, but all the Irish people I know do...
Curious, because I don't know a single irishman (or woman) that drinks it. I've seen plenty of tourists with a pint of it but no-one else, just about everyone I know drinks Harp or Smithwicks.
It really depends who the wake was for, my g/f's mothers wake had no drinking, she hated drink and everyone respected that, we had a pint or two at the meal after the funeral but it wasn't like one of them there gypsy wakes where they drink solidly for 48 hours then burn the house to the ground.
greencreeper
26-07-2004, 22:57
For music I want "Smack my Bitch Up by The Prodigy" and Live & Let Die by Wings.. Mainly because they are not really that appropriate..
Not appropriate? Like Knock on Wood for example, or Ashes to Ashes? ;) :D
Tezcatlipoca
26-07-2004, 22:58
Reminds me, didn't I read somewhere that they have to build LARGER crematorium furnaces, to accomodate the larger sizes.
I'm sure I read something recently about them doing that in the US...can't find any links to any articles though.
Tezcatlipoca
26-07-2004, 22:58
Anyone fancy this? ;)
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/berkshire/3389493.stm
Curious, because I don't know a single irishman (or woman) that drinks it. I've seen plenty of tourists with a pint of it but no-one else, just about everyone I know drinks Harp or Smithwicks.
Fair enough. All the Irish people I know are ex-pats, so maybe it's an ex-pat thing.
It really depends who the wake was for, my g/f's mothers wake had no drinking, she hated drink and everyone respected that, we had a pint or two at the meal after the funeral but it wasn't like one of them there gypsy wakes where they drink solidly for 48 hours then burn the house to the ground.
I didn't mean to convey the impression they were all like that. I do realise that not not everyone drinks at wakes. I do think it's nice to celebrate the life of the deceased person rather than mourn their death though.
Earl of Bronze
26-07-2004, 23:09
True, but all the Irish people I know do...
And, unless I am very much mistaken, lots of drinking does often go on at Wakes (whatever the drink).
The only tine I drink the stuff is at the Ireland Rugby International's in Dublin. Two pints a year is enough for me. Otherwise I :sick: , and the black poo the next day just is'nt right. :erm:
Fair enough. All the Irish people I know are ex-pats, so maybe it's an ex-pat thing.
Quite probably yeah
I didn't mean to convey the impression they were all like that. I do realise that not not everyone drinks at wakes. I do think it's nice to celebrate the life of the deceased person rather than mourn their death though.
Sorry, wasn't inferring that you were, probably came out a bit wrong.
Earl of Bronze
26-07-2004, 23:12
Anyone fancy this? ;)
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/berkshire/3389493.stm
11 grand for a bludy diamond, christ there's suckers for all sorts. :rolleyes:
Reminds me, didn't I read somewhere that they have to build LARGER crematorium furnaces, to accomodate the larger sizes.
I felt sorry for them at my nan's funeral, she was a big lady and they struggled a bit.
They're gonna have the same problem with my dad who scarily is turning into his mother...
True, but all the Irish people I know do...
And, unless I am very much mistaken, lots of drinking does often go on at Wakes (whatever the drink).
Yes, lots of drinking goes on in Wales, just as it does in England, Scotland, NI, Eire, France, Germany and just about any other country! Enough with the stereotypes please and on with the subject in hand!!
Mr_love_monkey
27-07-2004, 08:43
Yes, lots of drinking goes on in Wales, just as it does in England, Scotland, NI, Eire, France, Germany and just about any other country! Enough with the stereotypes please and on with the subject in hand!!
ermmm... didn't he say wakes not Wales...
ermmm... didn't he say wakes not Wales...
@ Mr_love_monkey: I did...
@ Russ: As I said earlier, I was actually making the point that some people like to celebrate the life of the recently deceased. And, for some people (regardless of nationality) drinking is part of that. I was not trying to convey the impression that any race was a bunch of raving alcoholics.
@ Mr_love_monkey: I did...
@ Russ: As I said earlier, I was actually making the point that some people like to celebrate the life of the recently deceased. And, for some people (regardless of nationality) drinking is part of that. I was not trying to convey the impression that any race was a bunch of raving alcoholics.
Never mind I understood what you were saying. :tu:
We are all very suddenly getting very protective of our various countries are we not?
Personally I just want folk to remember me with kindness,joy,mercy,love and with their particular choice of drink,alcoholic or non alcoholic,and to have a good time at the same time. :tu: :D
It should be a paaaaaaarrrrtttyyy .
Mr_love_monkey
27-07-2004, 10:31
If people didn't 'enjoy' themselves at my funeral, I'd come back and haunt them.....
orangebird
27-07-2004, 12:09
i dont like alcohol, i despise the stuff, however i dont judge others on whether they should or shouldnt drink it, its up to them, but not when my time is up!! :erm:
btw i also dont think drowning you sorrows is a good idea, there is nothing to celebrate really, just think/talk about the person who you have just lost....
I've been 10 funerals in as many years - drowning your sorrows is a bloody goog idea IMO and experience. Poeple deal with grief in their own ways.... The idea of a funeral is to mourn a death, but also to celebrate a life . I ceratinly don't want people having a thoroughly miserable time at my funeral, and I wouldn't dream of dictating from beyond the grave whether they could have a tipple or not... :rolleyes:
I wouldn't dream of dictating from beyond the grave whether they could have a tipple or not... :rolleyes:
so you would deny a deceased person wish ? :rolleyes:
personally i would find it offensive, i didnt drink , i dont like alcohol and a funeral is no place to celebrate something, as you said people mourn in diffarent ways but i dont think getting drunk or having a 'tipple' is sensible in these circumstances....
orangebird
27-07-2004, 12:26
so you would deny a deceased person wish :rolleyes:
At the risk of sounding callous - how the hell are they going to know???
At the risk of sounding callous - how the hell are they going to know???
it depends really, they could be watching ;) so when you join them........ ;)
orangebird
27-07-2004, 12:30
it depends really, they could be watching ;) so when you join them........ ;)
Good job I don't believe in all that claptrap then really... :angel:
In a stout (but not too stout) cardboard box buried in the middle of grassland on the north /NW Caldy Island coast.
But the monks wouldn't allow it I suppose. :confused:
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