11 year old - web access

[Osem]

Originally Posted by Pauls9

We had the computer set up in an "office" alcove off the hallway, so anyone passing could see what was on the screen. Restrictions weren't necessary.

Wouldn't work with a laptop of course.

Surely they could just tell the young lad he can only use the laptop where they can easily see what he's doing. It might even be easier with a laptop because if the adults need to be in another room they could take it with them.

[Acathla]

What about trusting him up front but setting up some logging so that you have a weekly check with him to ensure everything is above board.

That we you treat him as a grown-up which all kids like although make him aware that you will check what's been accessed on a weekly basis. Also gives an opportunity for mother/father to have 1-on-1 time...

[Aragorn]

Personally, I use OpenDNS filtering to make sure they don't get anywhere dodgy. Obviously only works until they know how to reconfigure the DNS server!

[beeman]

Ok ill repeat what i said last time an identical topic came up on this forum. Parental "control" is USELESS.

softwere
Softwere baised parental "control" is by far the easiest method to "break". If your child is resonably computer litterate (and beleave me it dosnt take much to hit the "resonably"). All they have todo is visit this site http://www.ubuntu.com/desktop/get-ubuntu/download download the softwere and create a "live cd/usb stick", Pop it in, reboot and bam they've defeated your control

hardwere
Still very easy but slightly harder due simply because it costs money (though not a lot) all they have todo is go here http://shop.o2.co.uk/promo/o2mobileb...tab/Pay_and_Go (or to their prefered 3g opperator) purchace a 3g dongle, pop it in and they've bypassed your router and thus your hardwere parental "control"

and of cause if you use both (hardwere and softwere) then they can ALSO use both (though theres fewer 3g dongals that work on linux last time i checked). And trust me an 11 year old can easilly get the skills/money needed to follow either of these options. And none of these takes into account that their mobile phone also proberlly already allowes them unlimited access to the web

In summery Maggy's advise is the best, simply TEACH your child (or in this case get your sister to teach her child) the dangers of the interweb, inparticlar the dangers of meeting IRL those you meet online and hope they follow your advise. The only other option of cause is to stand over your child 24/7, not letting them do anything thus socally stunting their development for years to come

oh and maggie not all porn sites are dirtly places rife with malewere/virii. my porn site has now been online for 6 years and not had 1 report of any nastys :-)

[Maggy J]

Originally Posted by beeman

Ok ill repeat what i said last time an identical topic came up on this forum. Parental "control" is USELESS.

softwere
Softwere baised parental "control" is by far the easiest method to "break". If your child is resonably computer litterate (and beleave me it dosnt take much to hit the "resonably"). All they have todo is visit this site http://www.ubuntu.com/desktop/get-ubuntu/download download the softwere and create a "live cd/usb stick", Pop it in, reboot and bam they've defeated your control

hardwere
Still very easy but slightly harder due simply because it costs money (though not a lot) all they have todo is go here http://shop.o2.co.uk/promo/o2mobileb...tab/Pay_and_Go (or to their prefered 3g opperator) purchace a 3g dongle, pop it in and they've bypassed your router and thus your hardwere parental "control"

and of cause if you use both (hardwere and softwere) then they can ALSO use both (though theres fewer 3g dongals that work on linux last time i checked). And trust me an 11 year old can easilly get the skills/money needed to follow either of these options. And none of these takes into account that their mobile phone also proberlly already allowes them unlimited access to the web

In summery Maggy's advise is the best, simply TEACH your child (or in this case get your sister to teach her child) the dangers of the interweb, inparticlar the dangers of meeting IRL those you meet online and hope they follow your advise. The only other option of cause is to stand over your child 24/7, not letting them do anything thus socally stunting their development for years to come

oh and maggie not all porn sites are dirtly places rife with malewere/virii. my porn site has now been online for 6 years and not had 1 report of any nastys :-)

I'm referring to the porn sites specifically set up to pull in the unwary and infect their pc and steal vital info as you very well know..

[nffc]

I basically agree with Maggy, and personally, wouldn't let an (average - it really depends on the kid!) under-14 use the internet unsupervised.

[rogerdraig]

personaly i say there is no point putting controls on there at all

if you feel he is too young to cope with some things then he should only being using the computer when supervised anyway as no parental controls out there can stop some one who wants to get unfettered access anyway

i am with Maggy J explain what you expect then its trust and maybe the odd checkon what they are doing

age wise i think it totaly depends on each child my 11 year old has no controlls on her computer but it is in the play room to which we are in to more often than not

my 9 year old uses the family computer which also has no controls but he is rarely on on his own and then we are normaly leaving him on a online game site we trust where he just plays

you have to decide what they are capable of coping with on thier own but dont be fooled into thinking that anything you use to limit access cant be bypassed rather easily if the child wants to

[nffc]

The best control is the user, not a piece of code. Explain to him how dangerous it is, how it is possible that people will not be who they say they are and out to victimise kids (in whatever way), that everything should be treated as dangerous unless proved otherwise, only to talk to people he knows and go to sites which are trusted, and more importantly to feel comfortable discussing things about the internet with a responsible adult, if he can trust someone and they can trust him to behave responsibly, then you don't need the filters at all. Depends on the kid - some are responsible for their age and act a few years older, some aren't.

[broadbandking]

I wouldn't let my 11 Year Old have a laptop of there own, that's if I had a child, I would have a family laptop and let them use it under my supervision. I wasn't subject to any limits when I had my first computer, but I was like 16 so I knew what was right or wrong, plus there was only Napster that was big then, I think it also helps my family was dumb found about computer, apart from my older brother.

[colin25]

@broadbandking
It also helped that in your time, your computer was programmed by punch cards, it was probably hard to tell which hole got you to porn site

But agreed, re own computer, no need, just have family one.

And a magazine of "Big Women", just tell him they all look like that without clothes, scare them good

[Caff]

After introducing them to the (then dial-up) resources that the net can provide I gave my wee ones a time-limited access and watched over their shoulder as inobtrusively as I could.

I was very wary of them wanting a mic or cam.

And then there was broadband... and they were all a bit older.. so I still kept a discreet eye over their shoulders and they knew I'd be 'keeping an eye' and they HAD to include me into conversations on, e.g. MSN whether I was logged in or not.

I never set up any filters and believed I had brought them up sensibly and kept an eye to make sure that I had. And cleaned up after my youngest who clicked on everything at the age of 14
I also wanted to deal personally with anything I thought might not be appropriate.

And I cleaned up after them at the weekend and checked that the NOD antivirus, Spyware Blaster, and Adware were doing their job and up to date. I went on all the sites they had subscibed to.
I watched what programs they had installed. Removed Limewire and demand they DO NOT reinstall it, more than once

It takes time - but sometimes it just might be wrth it.

Oh! - and then they go off into the outside world's web access
You have no idea how glad I have been with primary schools filters!

My middle one met her patrner online through a mutual like of a band and is and has been so happy since - so it's not all scary

Hope that helps