Monday morning call.

26-01-2004, 09:22

Ever had one of these on Monday ?

Husband: "Hi. I'm having a problem connecting to the Internet."
Tech Support: "Ok sir, what operating system are you using?"
Husband: "Oh...I'm really not sure...I'm not the computer expert. My wife is. She's sitting at the computer. I'm going to dictate this to her." (pause) "She says we use Windows 95."
Tech Support: "Ok. What exactly is the problem?"
Husband: "I can't connect."
Wife: (in the background) "We can't even get on -- the software is buggy!"
Tech Support: "Ok, what happens when you try to connect?"
Husband: "Ok, the Connect To: screen pops up, and it asks for my password."
Tech Support: "Did you put your password in?"
Husband: "Yes, and it keeps asking for it afterwards."
Tech Support: "Do you have your caps lock key on?"
Husband: "Yes, but that shouldn't make any difference."
Tech Support: "Uhm...go ahead and hit the caps lock key until the light goes away."
Husband: "Are you sure? We've always got on with the caps lock key on."
Tech Support: "Yes, I'm sure."
Husband: "Oh, ok. It took my password."
Wife: (in the background) "I told you!" (They start arguing. She takes the phone from him.) "HELLO?"
Tech Support: "Yes, hello, you should be all set from here."
Wife: "YES HI, I'VE BEEN USING YOUR DAMN SOFTWARE FOR I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW LONG, AND I STILL CAN'T GET EMAIL FROM MY SON IN THE NAVY!"
Tech Support: "What program do you use for email, ma'am?"
Wife: "I use Windows 95! We already told you that!"
Husband: (in the background) "We already told her that, didn't we?"
Tech Support: "No, what mail application...such as Eudora, Netscape, Internet Explorer..."
Wife: "Microsoft Netscape."
Tech Support: "Netscape?"
Wife: "Yes, Microsoft Netscape."
Tech Support: "Ok, open that up and go to Options, and then Mail and News Preferences--"
Wife: "No, I want email! I don't want to surf the net!"
Tech Support: "Netscape comes with an email program, and we're going to set it up now."
Wife: "Ugh. Fine. Whatever. We'll do it YOUR way."
Tech Support: "Ok." (explains how to set up popmail)
Wife: "I'm not getting mail."
Tech Support: "Do you have two phone lines?"
Suddenly I hear the modem attempting to dial in.

Tech Support: (over the roar of the modem) "MA'AM? YOU ONLY HAVE ONE PHONE LINE. DON'T TRY TO DIAL IN."
(beep click click)

Tech Support: "You can't dial up with this line. It's already in use."
Wife: "I was always able to use it before YOU changed my settings!"
Tech Support: "No, you will just have to disconn--"
Wife: "You tech support people always mess up my settings, and then I have to bring my computer back to [retailer] to get it fixed! You know, you cost me so much money!"
Tech Support: "Ma'am, I didn't change any of your Internet settings."
Wife: "Yes you did, we just went through a NUMBER of things."
Tech Support: "All we did was--"
Wife: "I've had ENOUGH of your service. I'm going back to AOL." (click)

paulyoung666 · 26-01-2004, 09:27

pmsl @ that

bopdude · 26-01-2004, 09:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by paulyoung666

pmsl @ that

Ditto, funny reading it but not so to be the techie ...lol

Jon M · 26-01-2004, 11:23

I've had a pretty good Monday morning in a similar vein.

Got in, started browsing my regular sites ( NTHW

).. flushed the legitimate items in the email queue... then, my PC decides it won't talk to our PDC (primary domain controller) .. which ain't good.. it also refuses to talk to our WINS server... so in basic terms my machine is pretty useless as a domain admin workstation until I get it sorted out.
As I'm scratching my noggin, my first visitor arrives.. with a nice easy virus issue to sort out on his laptop... so, away I go.. remove viruses.. no problem, but, in the process of doing so I notice that he is still running on service pack 1 for 2K. OK I think.. lets just quickly run an update.. and I can get rid of him before he spills anymore coffee down the back of my monitor.

Again, simple? noooo.. such luck.. service pack install fails specacularly.. I end up doing a repair on the OS from a CD. Reboot and.... BSOD.. reboot again, BSOD... start to well up and give laptop percussive maintenance.. reboot.. BSOD. Arrrgh.

Retry the repair from CD.. seems to work this time for some reason.. no BSOD.. phew.

In the mean time two more people have arrived with new problems and witty sarcastic comments which always go down well

and are hovering at the end of my desk.. grrreat!!

I love mondays

paulyoung666 · 26-01-2004, 11:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by s1lv3r

I've had a pretty good Monday morning in a similar vein.

Got in, started browsing my regular sites ( NTHW

).. flushed the legitimate items in the email queue... then, my PC decides it won't talk to our PDC (primary domain controller) .. which ain't good.. it also refuses to talk to our WINS server... so in basic terms my machine is pretty useless as a domain admin workstation until I get it sorted out.
As I'm scratching my noggin, my first visitor arrives.. with a nice easy virus issue to sort out on his laptop... so, away I go.. remove viruses.. no problem, but, in the process of doing so I notice that he is still running on service pack 1 for 2K. OK I think.. lets just quickly run an update.. and I can get rid of him before he spills anymore coffee down the back of my monitor.

Again, simple? noooo.. such luck.. service pack install fails specacularly.. I end up doing a repair on the OS from a CD. Reboot and.... BSOD.. reboot again, BSOD... start to well up and give laptop percussive maintenance.. reboot.. BSOD. Arrrgh.

Retry the repair from CD.. seems to work this time for some reason.. no BSOD.. phew.

In the mean time two more people have arrived with new problems and witty sarcastic comments which always go down well

and are hovering at the end of my desk.. grrreat!!

I love mondays

there you go , you shouldnt have fiddled about should you

, only kidding , it must have been a nightmare especially as you were trying to do a good deed

Pritch · 26-01-2004, 11:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by stuartbe

Tech Support: "Do you have two phone lines?"
Suddenly I hear the modem attempting to dial in.

You would not believe how often that happens to me. I sometimes try and talk back to the modem. Occasionally I manage to connect.

26-01-2004, 13:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pritch

You would not believe how often that happens to me. I sometimes try and talk back to the modem. Occasionally I manage to connect.

There was a guy at my uni who was convinced that he could handshake with the modem. He would makes beeps and wistles down the phone at the modem at the other end. We used to get calls from fax's on the payphone in the hall and one day he managed to get one to start sending the data by making sounds at the beep---beep---beep tone...

About 2 months later he lost all his work when his hdd went to the great hard drive yard in the sky.

This guy was totaly nutts !!!

Xaccers · 26-01-2004, 13:34

I knew some bint on msn who was panicing because she'd found some pr0n on her PC that her kids had apparently downloaded with kazza or something, and couldn't delete them.

So after her saying she couldn't delete them in windows, I thought we'd try it through command prompt.

Me: ok type cd\dodgypics
Her: done
M: ok type del *.*
H: done
M: what did it say?
H: nothing.
M: nothing? no messages about the numbers of files deleted, nothing about being unable to delete files
H: No, nothing
M: ok, do dir
H: done
M: ok what's on the screen
H: nothing
M: how can it be nothing? it should have something
H: its blank ok, look, I'll just take it to PC World
M: but they'll charge you.
H: look, some people don't like being given help when it's not asked for
M: but you asked me how to delete the files..
H: <general abuse>
M: block

paulyoung666 · 26-01-2004, 13:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xaccers

I knew some bint on msn who was panicing because she'd found some pr0n on her PC that her kids had apparently downloaded with kazza or something, and couldn't delete them.

So after her saying she couldn't delete them in windows, I thought we'd try it through command prompt.

Me: ok type cd\dodgypics
Her: done
M: ok type del *.*
H: done
M: what did it say?
H: nothing.
M: nothing? no messages about the numbers of files deleted, nothing about being unable to delete files
H: No, nothing
M: ok, do dir
H: done
M: ok what's on the screen
H: nothing
M: how can it be nothing? it should have something
H: its blank ok, look, I'll just take it to PC World
M: but they'll charge you.
H: look, some people don't like being given help when it's not asked for
M: but you asked me how to delete the files..
H: <general abuse>
M: block

do you ever get the feeling you cant win whatever you do

26-01-2004, 13:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xaccers

I knew some bint on msn who was panicing because she'd found some pr0n on her PC that her kids had apparently downloaded with kazza or something, and couldn't delete them.

So after her saying she couldn't delete them in windows, I thought we'd try it through command prompt.

Me: ok type cd\dodgypics
Her: done
M: ok type del *.*
H: done
M: what did it say?
H: nothing.
M: nothing? no messages about the numbers of files deleted, nothing about being unable to delete files
H: No, nothing
M: ok, do dir
H: done
M: ok what's on the screen
H: nothing
M: how can it be nothing? it should have something
H: its blank ok, look, I'll just take it to PC World
M: but they'll charge you.
H: look, some people don't like being given help when it's not asked for
M: but you asked me how to delete the files..
H: <general abuse>
M: block

Not an unusual call in the tech business.

I had a call once from a user. She started swearing at me from the second the forced call came in. Turns out her husband had downloaded a porn dialer and now they have a Ã‚Â£475.00 phone bill

She was blaming us for it !!