Why men die first

Kliro · 31-08-2005, 20:53

Sorry if this has been posted before but:

Why men die first is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries, but now we know... If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you're a male chauvinist;
If you stay home and do the housework, you're a pansy.

If you work too hard, there's never any time for her;
If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation;
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your lazy behind and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favoritism;
If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment;
If you keep quiet its male indifference.

If you cry, you're a wimp;
If you don't, you're an insensitive *******.

If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist;
If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination;
If she asks you, it's a favor.

If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you're a pervert;
If you don't, you're gay.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you're sexist;
If you don't, you're unromantic.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain;
If you don't, you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers, you're after something;
If you don't, you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements, you're full of yourself;
If you aren't you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she's tired;
If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

Men die first because they want to...