How far would you go for real love?

Dupre · 15-03-2004, 09:13

imagine the situation, you're going out with someone for 3 years. your perfectly happy, you're in love... suddenly things go tits up, and your left carrying the can of self pity...

What would you do? would you try to get it back? what would you do to get it back? could you carry on at all, are you sentimental? would you walk away and hope for more of the same with someone else?

15-03-2004, 09:18

I'd mope around for a few weeks, drink loads of beer with my mates. After about 3 weeks I'd wake up one morning and think **** it, i'm better off without her.
It will never work a second time, it didnt the first.
If he/she has cheated once, they will do it again.
I wouldnt be all sentimental, being like that will get in the way of you meeting someone else for a meaningfull over night relationship and possibly more.

TigaSefi · 15-03-2004, 09:30

Not to be impolite or rude but didn't u do another thread on this ?

Neil · 15-03-2004, 09:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by TigaSefi

Not to be impolite or rude but didn't u do another thread on this ?

Yes-& (again, no offence) Wouldn't this be better 'discussed' in private?

Dupre · 15-03-2004, 09:37

not the same, this is what would you do for REAL love?

im in the situation where im really messed up, im goin from one extreme to another, im seeing my GP later because of my suicidal tendancies.

but it doesnt matter how much drugs they push down my throat, they cant stop the fact that i dont have her. i spoke to her for nearly 3 hours last night til 4am, she still loves me and all the rest of it, shes just confused about her own life. however, she put numbers on how long its going to take, a year - 18 months, and every day is more of a struggle than the last.

and its not a matter of how many people say "pull yourself together" or "move on", they're not me, they dont have to live my life, im the one who has to justify my decisions.

but this thread isnt about me, its about what you would do for love.

Bifta · 15-03-2004, 09:42

Can I just point out .... its .... only .... a .... woman .... and no one single person is worth that amount of grief, female OR male.

15-03-2004, 09:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dupre

not the same, this is what would you do for REAL love?

im in the situation where im really messed up, im goin from one extreme to another, im seeing my GP later because of my suicidal tendancies.

but it doesnt matter how much drugs they push down my throat, they cant stop the fact that i dont have her. i spoke to her for nearly 3 hours last night til 4am, she still loves me and all the rest of it, shes just confused about her own life. however, she put numbers on how long its going to take, a year - 18 months, and every day is more of a struggle than the last.

and its not a matter of how many people say "pull yourself together" or "move on", they're not me, they dont have to live my life, im the one who has to justify my decisions.

but this thread isnt about me, its about what you would do for love.

Can I just point out I lost my girlfriend and unborn child (my girlfriend walked out when she was 2 months pregnant), I was messed up for a while, yet now I have met someone else, someone I am engaged to, someone I love more than I ever believed I could love someone.

It hurts but in the end you move on. Feeling sorry for yourself will eventually wear thin with your friends and then you will be in an even worse mess.
Stop contact with her, it isnt helping you.
Keep yourself busy, get a job away from where you live if necessary, but cut the contact with her, while you are speaking to her you will NEVER get over it.

Dupre · 15-03-2004, 10:01

i dont mean to sound rude, but ive pretty much decided my fate, im just wondering what other people would do.

like i said, no amount of "get over it"'s will help, because i dont want anything but her, shes literally what ive based my world around for 3 years, everyday.

while im waiting for certain things to arrive/take place, id be interested to know what other people would do

Avatar · 15-03-2004, 10:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dupre

i dont mean to sound rude, but ive pretty much decided my fate, im just wondering what other people would do.

like i said, no amount of "get over it"'s will help, because i dont want anything but her, shes literally what ive based my world around for 3 years, everyday.

while im waiting for certain things to arrive/take place, id be interested to know what other people would do

been there m8. and yes youre rite, no matter how much anyone says get over it you will feel you cant. but beleve me....one day you wake up and it doesnt hurt as much...keep you self busy...the more you think of her the harder it gets.

Bifta · 15-03-2004, 10:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dupre

i dont mean to sound rude, but ive pretty much decided my fate, im just wondering what other people would do.

like i said, no amount of "get over it"'s will help, because i dont want anything but her, shes literally what ive based my world around for 3 years, everyday.

while im waiting for certain things to arrive/take place, id be interested to know what other people would do

You're not the first person to have been f***** over in a long term relationship and by no stretch of the imagination will you be the last, it happens to someone probably every day, some of them wallow in self pity, some of them accept that only time will make them feel better and get on with their life, and some infer that they're going to commit suicide, this really isn't something I want to hear about, especially as I found my best friend hanging from the bannisters when I was 14 because his girlfriend had "slept around".

Dupre · 15-03-2004, 10:12

this is getting off topic, and its not what i need. i want to know what other people would do, not about my position. i know what im going to do, i want to know what people do for love.

Julian · 15-03-2004, 10:17

Yep I've been in that situation too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dupre

like i said, no amount of "get over it"'s will help, because i dont want anything but her, shes literally what ive based my world around for 3 years, everyday.

And that I'm afraid is where the problems start.... It's great to be in a long term relationship but..... for it to work well you both need interests away from each other as well IMO.

I hope you get yourself back together Dupre... and that you find someone else, when you do, enjoy your time together... but make sure you and her have your own space and time.

Dupre · 15-03-2004, 10:19

ok, can i say for the last time, if you want to discuss my life with me, PM me. theres things id need to say which would probably get threads removed etc.

so keeping this on track, what would you do if you lost the one thing that made a difference to your life?

danielf · 15-03-2004, 10:25

I've been there to

. She walked out on me after 6 years, without a word of warning. Yes, it was rough, and it took a long time to get over it, but I did. I was in a new relationship after 6 months, and I didn't take it too seriously. We were both going through a rough patch, and we would joke about our relationship being about 'a little discourse and intercourse' rather than being in love. It's 7 years down the line now, and we're still together. Planning to get married later this year. Look forward mate. It will get better.

Bifta · 15-03-2004, 10:27

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dupre

ok, can i say for the last time, if you want to discuss my life with me, PM me. theres things id need to say which would probably get threads removed etc.

so keeping this on track, what would you do if you lost the one thing that made a difference to your life?

Read the PM I just sent you, with an answer to your question.