Image and personality

[Halcyon]

With the increasing world of fashion and media influencing the way people look at themselves and change styles, what are your opinions on this...

What is most important to you when going out with someone and does it depend on male / female differences.

For example, are you more attracted to a person's personality than their looks or do looks strike out at you and then you get to know their personality ?

Recently I have got to know someone that I didnt pick out at first and did not find attractive until I got to know them. So this was a personality thing.
The girls body, features, etc, were not important to me as I liked her for her personlity mainly and now I like her for everything.

Other times, looks strike out at you. eg. when I see someone in the street that I think is really good looking. But the chances in this visual instance are that we probably have nothing in common.

So, what attracts you and keeps you interested ?
Would you still get together with someone if they were very good looking but had nothing interesting about them ?

Or would you be put off if you got on really well with someone but as soon as you got more into the relationship they had a birth mark / a deformed leg / strange shaped whatever, or something else ?
Maybe the girl doesnt shave ? Maybe the guy has chest hair ?
Would you think it important ?

I think I would stick by personality and if the girl I liked had anything wrong with her I would still like her as I could see things beyond this.

look at it, this way, Halcyon, in 30 years time, assuming you are with the same person, what will matter most, then?

Personality - and especially a sense of fun, is what makes a long term relationship work, the image becomes less & less important.

Nice if you can get both but, personally, I am more stimulated by a good conversation & a bit of a laugh, than by perfect hair & nails, but nothing between the ears.

[Halcyon]

Yeah thats the way I see things.
People shouldnt just look up to all the models on TV.
There is so much more to people than just the way they look.

Originally Posted by Halcyon

Yeah thats the way I see things.
People shouldnt just look up to all the models on TV.
There is so much more to people than just the way they look.

It does work both ways, a little, I've known women who will not leave the house unless they have spent time on their 'make up'. While out, they are often bold & vivacious. But underlying that is an insecurity, by 'making up' they are pretending they are someone else, and ultimately, in my opinion, if anyone is not happy with their 'real' self, they will never be able to have a true relationship, which imo implies leaving the 'self', behind.

It is back to the old cliché of 'can't love someone if you can't love yourself'