Child custody

[Ramrod]

Does anyone know if the courts ask a child which parent they would like to have custody of them (be their main carer) and if so, at what age?

.....I hope I am never in a situation to need this info for myself

[Hom3r]

I guess they would ask a child, but I don't know what.

I also believe that the child always stay with the mother unless, the mother is declared unfit. (drink, drugs, abuse)

[dilligaf1701]

Originally Posted by Ramrod

Does anyone know if the courts ask a child which parent they would like to have custody of them (be their main carer) and if so, at what age?

.....I hope I am never in a situation to need this info for myself

One of my m8's in the last couple of years went through a custody 'battle' In that situation (obviously I can't speak for everyone). The courts appointed a social worker to spend time with the children at both addresses and did indeed ask the children (who were 7 and 10 at the time) who they'd rather live with.

The children were asked about this away from BOTH parties.

This is only my personal experience so I can't say for definate what happens now.

---------- Post added at 20:46 ---------- Previous post was at 20:45 ----------

Originally Posted by david.ewles

I also believe that the child always stay with the mother unless, the mother is declared unfit. (drink, drugs, abuse)

Maybe it's also dependant on age (of the children) too then. My m8 won his custody and he's a man.

Dunno.

edit - you can pm me if you want to ask anything else... I'll be confidential.

[Chimaera]

A quick google found this:

Occasionally, it may be necessary to apply to the court for issues to be resolved. If so, the court will always consider the welfare of any child to be of paramount importance. There are four main orders that a court can make.

Residence (previously custody) - an order stating with whom a child is to live. There can be a joint residence order, although this is unusual because it is seldom practical.

Contact (previously access) - an order requiring the person with whom the child lives to allow the child to visit or stay with or have contact with a named person. This can include telephone contact or contact by correspondence.

Prohibited Steps - an order prohibiting specific steps in relation to a child; for example, a change of surname or removal from the country.

Specific Issue - an order determining a specific issue relating to a child; for example, an educational dispute or a dispute over medical treatment.

More info here

Actually the whole site is quite informative - www.divorce.co.uk - wish I'd known about it a few years back!

[cookie_365]

Courts will often ask older, maturer children, what their views are, but are very careful about making sure that they're not just being used as a bargaining point by the parents.

[Ramrod]

Originally Posted by cookie_365

Courts will often ask older, maturer children, what their views are

The kiddy in this case is 4yo....too young?

[marky]

I believe when my parents split it was 12, because i was asked.

Not a good thing for parent or child

[Maggy J]

Originally Posted by Ramrod

The kiddy in this case is 4yo....too young?

I would think so..But atlantis is currently undergoing a custody battle with his ex and he seems to know what the situation is in regards to this.

http://www.cableforum.co.uk/board/sh...&postcount=467

In my case, my ex is seeking a defined access order, not custody.
What used to be called Custody is now called a residency order.
Can't help any further than that though, sorry, just hope I don't get this thread locked down just by appearing, like it happaned in Florences thread "thinking about our missing members"?

[zovat]

Originally Posted by atlantis

In my case, my ex is seeking a defined access order, not custody.
What used to be called Custody is now called a residency order.
Can't help any further than that though, sorry, just hope I don't get this thread locked down just by appearing, like it happaned in Florences thread "thinking about our missing members"?

From memory, the child will always be asked if they are deemed old enough to make such a decision (some kids grow up quicker than others), but this will only be "taken into account", the child may express a preference, and still end up with the other parent if the court feels that their welfare would be better served by this arrangement).

As to the close thread issue - I would say that this is most definately on topic, so no issues there

[cookie_365]

Originally Posted by Ramrod

The kiddy in this case is 4yo....too young?

Way too young.

[Gareth]

Originally Posted by cookie_365

Way too young.

Yep, I agree... at age 4, most kids will want to go live with Willy Wonka!

[Ramrod]

Originally Posted by cookie_365

Way too young.

Buggr!

Yep, I agree... at age 4, most kids will want to go live with Willy Wonka!

lol.....in this case he much prefers dad to mum.....

[wilcoxm]

set my mind at ease - My partner is divorced and has a 7 year old daughter, who has contact with her real father. A mutual agreement of every other weekend and 2 hours on a wednesday has been the case for 6 years after he walked out for another women.

He has now dropped a bombshell to "us" as he has now said that he is going for custody of his daughter (and his son from a new relationship, which he has left also)

My gut feeling that he has no leg to stand on if he proceeds with this, but can anyone put my mind at ease so i can reasure my other half that all will be OK. What grounds do i have as a so-called step father, and a DAD that he hasnt been

Details are a little vauge, but you should get the idea.

Any advice would put my and the other half's mind at ease.

Cheers all

[Ramrod]

afaik, courts go in favour of the mother + if he walked out then he really shouldn't have a claim.......but when has fair play had anything to do with it?