Could Life Get Better, Get Worse or Stay the Same?

Orior · 13-12-2005, 16:46

Scenario:

After many many many years of marriage and kids, husband looses interest in wife. Absolutely no feeling whatsoever.

Options:

1) Stick with it, and pray for the end of time;
2) Work at it and by some miracle rejuvenate the interest and live happily ever after;
3) Head off with Debbie from Accounts and go back home to wife 3 months later rejuvenated and live happily ever after;
4) Head off with Debbie from Accounts and live happily ever after.

What do you reckon?

Nugget · 13-12-2005, 16:54

Well, if you went with number 3, you deserve a slap 'round the back of the head for being a complete tosspot. Just my opinion, of course...

Orior · 13-12-2005, 16:58

Aye, fair enough, but you haven't seen Debbie from Accounts.

**Maggy J** · 13-12-2005, 19:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by Orior

Aye, fair enough, but you haven't seen Debbie from Accounts.

You deserve a double slap for that.

jellybaby · 13-12-2005, 19:35

IF your feeling like that, do yourself, and more importantly, your wife a favour and go. What you do after that is up to you

Chimaera · 13-12-2005, 19:35

How about 'none of the above'?

The man concerned sounds like a right pig - he has 'lost interest' so now wants to go off with a better (in his eyes) option. No regard for the wife he has been married to for however long, and certainly no regard for the children, whom he is equally responsible for.

Although, as he sounds such a charmer, perhaps the wife would see it as a welcome release to be rid of such a selfish husband..........

Ramrod · 13-12-2005, 19:39

Option 2.....be a man.

Orior · 13-12-2005, 21:04

Interesting responses so far.
Looks like no-one on this board has ever been separated or divorced? Or if they have, they would not wish it to happen to anyone else. Lesson must be that second marriages/relationships never ever ever work.

Chimaera · 13-12-2005, 21:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by Orior

Interesting responses so far.
Looks like no-one on this board has ever been separated or divorced? Or if they have, they would not wish it to happen to anyone else. Lesson must be that second marriages/relationships never ever ever work.

Yes thank you, I've been divorced and wouldn't wish it on anyone - and I was in an abusive relationship. If I'd stayed in it the chances are I wouldn't be here now. In spite of that I tried everything (counselling etc) to make it work, as there were children involved. I'm now in another realtionship and couldn't be happier - so how can you say that second time round doesn't work? Perhaps not for you - but don't tar everyone with the same brush.

13-12-2005, 21:57

My choice?

Grow up, stick with your partner, after all its as likely to be your fault as hers.

Jon M · 13-12-2005, 22:19

I suggest secret option 5.

Get help from a professional marriage counsellor.

And if you haven't already been doing the first part of option 2, that may be why you are now in this situation.
All marriages need hard work to maintain, it's sometimes a grind but most often a joy to put that effort in.
If both partners know how to be truely selfless and have the willpower to act on it you'll be fine.
However, if one or both of you have a selfish outlook it's not going to bring you together.

Halcyon · 13-12-2005, 22:27

I'd agree with Jon M.
You've got a history together, you've got kid's.....try and see if you can patch things up and seek advice if you need it in a councellor.
You've been together long enough. It would be a waste to chuck it all away.

Try to make a list of the bad and good things and if need be, take things slowly and start working things out.

IMO, you need to give it another shot. Think back to the good old times and remind yourself why you married this person. It will require both of you to work at it, but atleast give it a go.
Good luck.

luftys · 13-12-2005, 23:35

I would say try and make it work,then try some more
I tryed for 10 years,but for her the grass was greener some where else

Its no fun being on your own,but I was lucky I got the kids

**Rob** · 14-12-2005, 00:05

Option 10 (I've lost count)

Stay single

danielf · 14-12-2005, 00:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by Incognitas

You deserve a double slap for that.

It made me laugh though

No easy answers here, I suggest this person starts with a good chat with his wife, as it sounds like it may have been a while...