Am I being a bad parent

Ok im posting this here but it could easily be in the Gaming section. As some of you know im an avid and serious player of Medal of Honor Spearhead multiplayer.My 9 year old daughter has watched me play and wants to play too.Ive not had a problem letting her play and have had her playing on the clan server a few times.
Today however my ex wife/Bethia's mother desided she wanted to try to lay the law down and told me not to let her play.Bethia does not take these games as real she enjoys them she also plays UT2004,Yes these games have violence in them but her mum has her watching Buffy and Stargate where violence is part of the program surely?
Should I stop my daughter playing these games because of her mothers concerns? does the fact she knows its just a game make a difference ? Any advice gratefully accepted

[Hom3r]

Its a tough call, you know your daughter, but you may get problems from you ex if she gets the hump with you and take thing further.

try and get and play games with her that fall in to her age group.

MoH is only a 12 ok she is 9 but its not exactly graphic.We share responsability so neither one has power over the other but I may well air on the side of caution to keep the ex sweet

I think that, ultimately, you will have to go for the decision which causes the least friction between you all. If that means your daughter not playing the game, it will also show her that mum & dad can co-operate & compromise for the greater good.

The main difficulty that I see is selling it in such a way that doesn't make either of the parents the 'baddie', but is seen as coming equally from you both.

[Hom3r]

Its proberly better to air on the side of caution to keep the ex sweet,

You can't ask your daughter to keep it a secret, because that could be a bad thing (My sister has two kids and tells them its a surprise rather than a secret)

[Ramrod]

Imo, Buffy is far worse for a 9yo (demons, horror etc....) than letting her watch/play MOHAA.
We let ours watch me play MOHAA sometimes (4 and 5 yo), they know it's not reality. As for letting them play it.....I think 9 yo is ok...

[Angua]

My 9 year old girl is into Runescape and seems to have no problem with battling goblins but is a real softy otherwise. Perhaps this might be more acceptable to her mother.

[Marge]

Could it be perhaps that your ex doesn't see this as a game that a girl should be playing, I think things may be different if this was your son

Modern life is complicated - ah for the innocence of Pacman, destroying everything that went before him!

Dunno about this one. I was pretty horrified to see my youngest's mate, aged 9, being well into Grand Theft Auto. I personally wouldn't let my kids play that or MoH. That is partly because of my own morality but mainly because I don't play them myself (I used to happily play Driver which is hardly a moral game as such and my young uns love Need For Speed and I don't have a problem with that; why would I, was better at it than them ). Ok, perhaps not quite on the same moral divide, but you get my drift. The fact that you do play the game with your child does make a difference IMO - that's healthy even if the game is IMO, not terribly PC As long as your kid understands, as I'm sure she does, that it's not real, that it's not the way the world works and that, above all, it's something she does with you because you both enjoy it, then, in that sense, sod it.


But the fundamental issue to me is that your ex doesn't approve. That's nowt to do with your daughter and something you need to work on yourselves.

[dilligaf1701]

I don't see a problem with it. But you'd have probably have guessed that anyway.

[clupet]

hi

Ive been working with school age children for 12 years and , I my experience is that children should be allowed to be children for as long as possible and these games have ratings for a reason the same as some tv programs are unsuitable. It is the parents choice but it does worry me the violence children seem to readily accept now through viewing unsuitable movies, tv & games. It can affect their behaviour and introduces them to sights and vocalbury they should not know at that age.

As a childcare worker I would say ask yourself what your child gets from that time and is there a more appropiate game you could play, but i can understand you are sharing something you love to play with your daughter. just my two cents worth.

[punky]

You should at least try to convince the mother that simply banning something is the worst way of dealing with it... especially as your daughter has already played the game. If she wants to play it, she'll find a way. At her own house, at a friend's house.. you aren't gaining anything. Try and convince your wife that they should work with your daughter to make sure the games don't trigger any violence from her.

You aren't being a bad parent by letting her play. The certifications are guidelines for the "average" kid (whatever that is). They are guidelines to help someone who doesn't know the game, understand it and wether it is safe for their particular child.

Could it be perhaps that your ex doesn't see this as a game that a girl should be playing, I think things may be different if this was your son

You mean should be doing something girly like playing "fetch the beer from the fridge for the clan member"?

Of course she would be different if she had a boy. We are men. We live to kill and destroy things. That's what we are designed do. Your lot live/are designed to cook forementioned dead things.

[grunting] Now, I am off to drag a cheerleader back to my cave by her hair [/grunting]

[Ramrod]

I see it as playing cops and robbers or cowboys and indians....just on a screen...

[Paul M]

tbh, I would tell her to get stuffed.

[SMHarman]

Originally Posted by andyl

Modern life is complicated - ah for the innocence of Pacman, destroying everything that went before him!

It's an old one, but "Bouncing around in the dark swallowing little happy pills (no reality in that game then)."