Dog phobia

Central · 26-04-2009, 21:19

I have a dog and have had her for 7 years. Love her to bits and she is my best friend.

Now I have met a new partner and been going strong now for a few months. In about a years time we are planning to move in together.

Here lies the problem.

She has two sons who have a phobia of dogs. They will be 4 and 3 by the time we move in. Is there any help we can get as I dont really want to lose my dog.

Cheers

AndyCambs · 26-04-2009, 21:21

Not a help for you - but in my case, it would be "love me - love my dog"...

I suppose the question is - how phobic are they and what sort of dog do you have and what temperament?

Central · 26-04-2009, 21:24

Its a german shepard cross. She is as soft as fluff.

http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z...i/a076fdd7.jpg

AndyCambs · 26-04-2009, 21:26

Like mine - crossed with something or other.
Does she like children (and not just for breakfast or in-between meals)?

Mine does have the tendency to get a tad excited when people leave (ironically not when they arrive...)

Raistlin · 26-04-2009, 21:29

With respect to yourself and your partner - you're talking about moving in together in a year's time, you're saying the children will be 3 amd 4 years old then, that would make then 2 and 3 years old now.....

2 and 3 year old children don't have 'phobias', they have behaviour that they exhibit in certain situations which is a direct product of the behaviour that the adults around them exhibit in those same situations.

Children need to learn a healthy respect for all animals from an early age, but they also need to know not to fear them.

The only thing I can suggest is that you expose the children to your dog in a controlled manner, in short stints, and over a long period of time. Make sure the dogs isn't too boisterous, snappy or loud, and make sure you never leave the children alone with the dog (ever, ever) no matter how much you trust it. Start with something simple like all of you walking the dog together as a 'family' excersise - then have the dog in the room, sat/laying down quietly, whilst the children are there - get them used to having the dog around, but don't force contact between the dog and the children.

Remember as well that this isn't just about the children, this is about the dog as well. Dogs have a pack mentality, at the moment you are the leader of your pack, with the dog coming beneath you. When you introduce your new partner and the children to your 'pack' this will change, and you may find that you start to get small problems with the dog's behaviour as it tries to find its place in the new, larger, pack.

AndyCambs · 26-04-2009, 21:39

I'd agree with Rob - all take the dog out for a walk.
If she is quiet (the dog I meant), then have the children in the room when she is laying by your chair. From the dog's view as well, she will probably be apprehensive about the children just as much as they are about her.

tweetypie/8 · 26-04-2009, 21:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by Central

I have a dog and have had her for 7 years. Love her to bits and she is my best friend.

Now I have met a new partner and been going strong now for a few months. In about a years time we are planning to move in together.

Here lies the problem.

She has two sons who have a phobia of dogs. They will be 4 and 3 by the time we move in. Is there any help we can get as I dont really want to lose my dog.

Cheers

no offence intended central,but lose the partner or get her to accept your feelings towards your dog lol.

**Stuart** · 26-04-2009, 21:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by Central

I have a dog and have had her for 7 years. Love her to bits and she is my best friend.

Now I have met a new partner and been going strong now for a few months. In about a years time we are planning to move in together.

Here lies the problem.

She has two sons who have a phobia of dogs. They will be 4 and 3 by the time we move in. Is there any help we can get as I dont really want to lose my dog.

Cheers

When I was a child, I was terrified of dogs. My mum's answer? To buy a large airedale thus forcing me to get over my fear. She chose an Airedale because they are very gentle and friendly. It worked. I now own two Yorkshire terriers and they are an important part of the family.

lucy7 · 27-04-2009, 07:49

Lots of good advice already.

If you get rid of your dog, it would eat you up, the love that man and dog can have together is very strong!

Small children can get nervy around any large animal, especially a lively dog.
The children need to get over any fear/phobia, the sooner the better really, so I would say follow the advice already given.

My eldest was a bit stupid about being around dogs at about the age of 5, my solution was not to keep her way from them, but to actively put her near them, it worked and we ended up getting a cracker of a little dog (I still miss him loads) she loved him to bits, and now babysits dogs when shes asked to for money (sleep overs)

**Stuart** · 27-04-2009, 09:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stuart C

When I was a child, I was terrified of dogs. My mum's answer? To buy a large airedale thus forcing me to get over my fear. She chose an Airedale because they are very gentle and friendly. It worked. I now own two Yorkshire terriers and they are an important part of the family.

Actually, the above makes my mum sound rather sadistic.. She wasn't. She had wanted a dog for a long time, but waited until I'd shown an interest in my Uncle's collie who was a lovely dog.

WHISTLED · 27-04-2009, 09:43

As per Rob, the kids are babies now and may be nervous of a big bouncy dog but they dont have phobias. Its usually behaviour passed on from a nervous parent that pulls their kids away from dogs in the park etc.

Just expose them to the dog, if they scream and cry take it slowly, it should only take a few walks round the park for them to trust her.

haydnwalker · 27-04-2009, 11:14

We've recently got a puppy (Cavalier King Charles - shes 7months now) and my brothers fiancee is terrified of dogs. She wouldn't let our old King Charles (sadly died last year - old age) anywhere near her even though she wasn't fussed and would just lay on the floor happily.

Now however because she's met the puppy while she was a baby and needing to be lifted out of sticky situations occasionally - she now wants one of her own. Strange how past experiences affect people.

If you let your partners kids be in the house (to begin with) while the dogs there, they might get curious, but they need to see how you are with your dog and how she reacts to your commands etc for them to get the picture that you are in charge of the dog and that she won't just head for them without your say so.

Sometimes - its the humans that need training

---------- Post added at 11:14 ---------- Previous post was at 11:13 ----------

I've always wanted a dog (as the old one was my wifes dog from when she was little - i kind of inherited her

) from a puppy and I wouldn't change it for the world...

I was terrified when I was little of dogs!

Raistlin · 27-04-2009, 11:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by haydnwalker

Sometimes - its the humans that need training

I don't think there's any 'sometimes' about it

superbiatch · 27-04-2009, 11:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by haydnwalker

Sometimes - its the humans that need training

Watch the Dog Whisperer - its actually ALL our fault

haydnwalker · 27-04-2009, 11:24

I've seen it - and I agree sometimes