where do i start ?

[kronas]

ok im in a slight situation here, basically im getting increasingly frustrated about living at home, i want to move out but alas i dont have a job im on medication and i cant work, part of the reason im ill is becuase of my family around me, im always under certain pressures and its not nice i just want to be left alone....so i dont know what to do next i just want to be on my own ive tried to commit suicide once and i dont want to again, im cracking up

[Graham M]

Are you on Anti-D's mate?

[Roy MM]

Bloody hell kron you are so young get to grips m8 the world is your Oyster .

[kronas]

Originally Posted by Zeph

Are you on Anti-D's mate?

yes and none seem to help

[Graham M]

which ones are you currently on and how many are you taking?

[kronas]

Originally Posted by Zeph

which ones are you currently on and how many are you taking?

zopiclone 10mg and zeprexa 10mg, tried diffarent ones and dosages, but tis not about that, i just want to get the hell out of the house im in, but nowhere to go and turn, so im stuck

[Graham M]

hmm ill try find out what my Girlfriend is on, they seem to do the trick for her. Umm best thing i can suggest is knuckled down and get a decent enough job so you can save the money for the deposit on a small flat, or perhaps a flat share, or room in a house or something, its a start anyway

[Raistlin]

Ok.

I think we've had parts of this discussion before matey, so first of all I'll repeat what I ended on last time.

Sometimes the best thing you can do is talk to someone about things, even if they only sit and listen and you do all the talking.
If you ever want to talk about anything, without fear of judgement or having it repeated, then you know where I am. You can reach me by PM or you can email me (I'll PM you my email address in a moment).

Right, that's the first bit out of what I wanted to say.

The second bit might be a little more difficult for you to read - I want you to just take what I have to say at face value, I'm not getting at you or your situation (I don't understand your situation well enough to judge it or you), I'm just calling this as I see it.


From your post it sounds like a lot of your pressures/worries are being generated by your home environment. It could genuinly be as a result of that environment, or it could be a symptom of something else.
You need to rule your home environment out of the equation by getting away from it for a while.

Take yourself away somewhere for a couple of weeks. Go on holiday, on your own or with some friends, and get as far away from home (and the associated pressures) as you can.

By doing that you will get an idea of whether it is home that is causing you to feel the way you do or not. I know that at the moment it's clear in your mind that home is the problem, that's probably only because that's where you are right now.

Once you've had your holiday you should have a clearer picture of what was wrong. Think about what you missed and what you didn't miss about being away from home. Was it the people? Was it the house? Was it the area?

From there you can work on a plan of how to get yourself into a place where you can feel comfortable.

The key to this though will be talking this through with people. Your doctor, and the CAB, and your friends/family, should be able to help you identify some options with regards to housing (if you decide you need to move out). You could apply to the council for a house (although this may take some time) or there could be some sheltered accomodation near you that you could stay in for a while.
Perhaps you have family or friends that you could move in with (even for a short period of time)?

Something else that I think you need to seriously look at is taking control of where you're heading.

You say that you can't work..... I'm assuming that this is because of your condition, or because of the medication? In that case you need to have two goals here.

First, you need to prove to yourself (and to others) that you are in control of what's going on in your life. Sorting your home environment is one step towards that, finding a job will be the next.
Any sort of job, even if it is only part time, will bring a bit more focus to your life than you have at the moment. It will also give you more independence (to go along with your new living arrangements).

Secondly I think you need to create a vision for yourself of what you want from life. Where do you want to be in 5 years time? Be specific, pick an image and then create that image in your head. Use all of your senses, feel the air moving around you, hear the noises that are in the backgound, smell the scent that is created by this new environment, lose yourself in the emotion of that moment - now reach out in your mind and grab all of that moment and hold it tight. That's the moment, that's the time, that's the vision of your future that you need to remember.

Whatever that moment/vision is, you can achieve it. You will need support and help along the way, you need to learn to trust those people who offer their help to you honestly - not everybody is out to hurt you. If someone does hurt you then forget about them and move on - life's too short to dwell on the people that care that little about you.

There is a time and a place for you Kronas, that time is now, that place is wherever you want it to be. You just need to know where it is and make your own path to it.

If I can do anything to help you to get there I will.

I wanted to move out aswell but there's no chance basically, I'm still going through college, me and a few friends were thinking about flat sharing but nobody wanted to do it and could afford it, I could probably afford a share because I have quite a good paying part time job and I believe it's legal at 17, and I would love to. My Dad keeps telling me to get the hell out of the house everytime I have an argument with him so I'm sure my parents won't mind. I cannot stand living here, it's like a frigging dictatorship. Can you believe I'm not even allowed to say the word fart?

[Raistlin]

Originally Posted by Diamond

Can you believe I'm not even allowed to say the word fart?

It's not saying it that I would have a problem with.....

Yeah getting a job is good advice Kronas, of course there's the money but I've found that it's psychologically beneficial. I have found out over the years that after weeks spent in the summer holiday doing buggar all day, day after day I tend to go a bit loopy and depressed, it's because I'm not occupied. A jbo will provide rhythm and keep you occupied - which is always good for a depressive mind - and also with the income you could be able to get a flat on your own, thus breaking away from the cycle. So yes my advice is #1 Try your very best to get yourself a job, make this your primary target - it may be hard given your situation but you do need to get yourself out of that nasty cycle you're in.

It doesn't seem right that I'm advising someone who is older than me and more intelligent than me so sorry if you're offended

[kronas]

ok guys thanks, im going to go down the CAB on tuesday and see what i can do, i know what some of the problems are, its not just about the people around me but psychologically too, i need my own space and time to grow as a person.

as for a job been there a few times and i just cant seem to do anything, ive tried many times and have had to walk out and quit because my mind and body cave in, i so wanted to go to college and learn something but again, my mind and body let me down, im defeatist right now, and being at home with people who are bugging me to a point, telling me to do things when i cant even handle my own self, my situation physically, psychologically and emotionally is just too bad, my mind is not up to it at all, ive tried it all, i come back to the same point, i need a complete change of direction.

[marky]

Kronas

try to focus on what you want forget the rest .
i've been there mate
most people that give advice are thinking of no1 and thats not you.
if you want a flat get one
if you want to shout then shout
dont let them get you down
be who you are and screw the rest, trust me it works ( if its within the law terms and conditions apply)

[Steve H]

Considered volunteer work abroad... ?

Originally Posted by kronas

yes and none seem to help

Hey mate I've been on them for over 3 years, if you need any info PM me. If your talking about the room with no windows Ive been there.