Toilet - Hygeine/Health/Etiquette

Jon M · 14-03-2005, 13:27

In keeping with the trend in gutter posts lately, I thought I'd add a thought from about 5 minutes ago.

VindaPoo

On my latest of infrequent visits to the work facilities ( in a mission to deposit what is left of my friends very good corned beef vindaloo

) I took a vacant stall two doors from an occupied one.

Nothing out of the ordinary there, apart from when the poor chap nearby decided he was finished.
He proceeded to repeatedly roll the loo-paper, and wipe with the sort of vigor that would shame Michael Flatley.
The ass-rasping continued for at least 6 repetitions, by which time I was starting to wonder whether to call an ambulance on my mobile.

Fortunalty, it ended there and to my relief he washed his hands (not as common in our workplace as I would like).

My thought, basically, is that surely this guy is damaging himself by doing this?
Any doctors in the house that know a safe/correct way to wipe?

Nugget · 14-03-2005, 13:28

Quote:

Originally Posted by s1lv3r

In keeping with the trend in gutter posts lately, I thought I'd add a thought from about 5 minutes ago.

VindaPoo

On my latest of infrequent visits to the work facilities ( in a mission to deposit what is left of my friends very good corned beef vindaloo

) I took a vacant stall two doors from an occupied one.

Nothing out of the ordinary there, apart from when the poor chap nearby decided he was finished.
He proceeded to repeatedly roll the loo-paper, and wipe with the sort of vigor that would shame Michael Flatley.
The ass-rasping continued for at least 6 repetitions, by which time I was starting to wonder whether to call an ambulance on my mobile.

Fortunalty, it ended there and to my relief he washed his hands (not as common in our workplace as I would like).

My thought, basically, is that surely this guy is damaging himself by doing this?
Any doctors in the house that know a safe/correct way to wipe?

Who cares as long as it's all gone

Raistlin · 14-03-2005, 13:28

I thought I'd read it all.....

14-03-2005, 13:29

whats there term for a voyeur who only listens

**Russ** · 14-03-2005, 13:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by s1lv3r

My thought, basically, is that surely this guy is damaging himself by doing this?

He would be if he's using that tracing-paper-esque stuff you used to get in school

Quote:

Originally Posted by s1lv3r

Any doctors in the house that know a safe/correct way to wipe?

If you're female, always front to back

Anyway this remind me of a toilet encounter I had a few years back (not in the George Michael sense).

Was washing my hands when from one of the cubicles some bloke went "Hello?"

The guy in the adjacent cubicle said "Hello?" back.

Bloke 1 asked "So how are you then?"

Bloke 2 replied "Erm.....not bad"

"What have you been up to?"

"Errrr......shopping with the wife and kids...."

Then bloke number 1 said "Look, I'll have to call you back, some idiot next to me keeps answering my questions to you"

Ramrod · 14-03-2005, 13:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by s1lv3r

My thought, basically, is that surely this guy is damaging himself by doing this?

To the best of my knowledge it's impossible to wipe your arse off...........so he's probably in no danger

__________________

Quote:

Originally Posted by gary_580

whats there term for a voyeur who only listens

yep.........silv3r

Jon M · 14-03-2005, 13:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by Russ D

He would be if he's using that tracing-paper-esque stuff you used to get in schooL

It certainly isn't far off that sort of stuff... I was in pain just listening to it.

Paul · 14-03-2005, 13:37

You sure he was wiping his ass with vigour and not giving something else a work out? We're all hoping you didn't pop into the neighbouring stall to check for damage

Jon M · 14-03-2005, 13:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by Russ D

Then bloke number 1 said "Look, I'll have to call you back, some idiot next to me keeps answering my questions to you"

classic!!

Nugget · 14-03-2005, 13:47

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paul

You sure he was wiping his ass with vigour and not giving something else a work out? We're all hoping you didn't pop into the neighbouring stall to check for damage

From the sound of it, he definitely bust a gut

**Russ** · 14-03-2005, 14:06

Or a hemorrhoid....

Ramrod · 14-03-2005, 14:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by Russ D

Or a hemorrhoid....

You mean 'arse-grapes'?

**Russ** · 14-03-2005, 14:11

No, Chalfonts

Halcyon · 14-03-2005, 14:55

The main thing that annoys me is people who dont wash their hands, and when there are loads of doors to get in to the toilets.
I'l explain.... Lets say you go to the toilet. You do your business and Joe bloggs comes out before you and doesnt wash his hands.
You however, come out and wash your hands.

BUT.... to get out of the toilet, you are going to have to pull open the same door Joe Bloggs pulled open a few seconds ago, meaning all the germs are going to fall onto you again. !!!

I personally avoid all public toilets.

TheBlueRaja · 14-03-2005, 14:55

When dropping the kids off at the pool, I tend to use several sheaf's just to make sure - but have never counted the amount.

Besides, it depends on whats going on - if - as you say it was a Vindapoo then it could be a lot - however the, thankfully, less common - "Pray and Spray" or "Bleeding the Radiator" variety may require less due to it being more liquid by nature.

The worst one has to be turtle or the limpet though - the one that refuses to come out the whole way no matter how much you push - and attatches itself to your cornholio for no apparent reason other than you ate too much stodgy white bread. There could be no limit to the number of sheaf's required for that baby.